AITAH for not wanting to talk about the Russian military
First of all I’d like to apologize for my imperfect English, it’s probably very hard to read. With that I’ll start my story.
Context: I was raised in a household where i was always welcome to open to my mother about my troubles, she was always there for me and I truly have very good parents. Despite that, recently there was a situation that made me question who is in the wrong here:
So recently i finished serving in the Russian military (one year obligatory service for males above 18), it’s a pretty crappy place, and i was under so much distress that i was often thinking about cutting myself in order to get into a mental institution (especially because i was in one the most stressful positions in the entire battalion for the entire time (one guy, who was in the same position as me, blew up himself on a grenade because of the stress))
Now I’m finally free and i don’t mind voluntarily sharing small stories, but i don’t really like getting asked about the *unpleasant* sides of my time there, and even though i can’t say that was absolutely horrific, it was still the most stressful time of my life (and i don’t even get the nightmares, my time there was genuinely light, despite being the most stressful time of my life).
Half a year has passed after i “graduated” and one day i find myself casually telling my mom a little story about how i was hiding from an inspection.
but she decided to ask “have you been hurt in the military?” (I obviously been hurt, beaten etc. it’s out of question and she *Knows that*. but i don’t really wanna talk about it), so i tell her that “i don’t wanna talk about it, pls don’t ask me these types of questions”, for some reason she decided to continue despite my plead: “so it must’ve been horrible there, if you’re so repulsed to talk about it”, i once again tell her, that “i don’t wanna talk about this topic”, after that she decided to use her ultimate attack: “maybe you got raped there” (?????????wtf??????), so i explode with anger and we go into an argument where it turns out “i should’ve just left if i wanted her to stop poking, picking and nagging that topic”.
despite *extensive* arguments i provided to prove that one should stop prying into the topic if asked to (IMO it’s the most basic rule in human relationships), she still believes that she did the right thing, because “now she knows that this is a sensitive topic”, so i left all attempts to prove her why she’s in the wrong here and told her that i will never share anything with her ever again, “since she betrayed my trust in her that she herself built over the many years of literally raising me this way”
Edit: I haven't been to war