Im tired of being the strong one when im falling apart too.
I still remember how kind and gentle you were to me. You used to send unexpected compliments, say "I miss you," apologize when you made a mistake, share random updates about your day, and stay up talking to me late into the night till morning and would grab breakfast because we crave for somethin
Those little things may have seemed ordinary to you, but they meant everything to me.
Pero alam ko rin na hindi lang ikaw ang nagbago. I had my faults too. There were times when I let my emotions get the best of me. May mga nasabi akong masasakit na salita dahil nasaktan ako, dahil galit ako, o dahil hindi ko alam kung paano ipaliwanag nang maayos yung nararamdaman ko. I know my words hurt you, and if I could take them back, I would. For that, I'm truly sorry. Im sorry for controlling and hindering you with the things you’re happy to do rn.
Pero kahit gano'n, I never thought we'd become this distant.
Unti-unting nawala yung warmth sa mga usapan natin. The effort that once came so naturally started to feel forced, until one day, it felt like I was talking to someone completely different. I really miss my old self also, the old us. You, sometimes gives the forced ‘iloveyou’
I don't just miss you. I miss the way you cared. I miss the random updates, the late-night conversations, the way you'd reassure me without me asking, and the comfort of knowing that I mattered to you. I miss the version of us that felt like we could get through anything together.
Maybe people change. Maybe love changes too. Maybe we both made mistakes that slowly pushed us apart. But sometimes, I still catch myself wondering what happened to the man I loved-the man who was patient with me, gentle with me, and never made me question his feelings. Im sorry if i felt like i was left alone hanging. I still love you, i really do. Im staying not because nasasayangn ako or whatever to the memories we shared, the ups and downs we’ve been to. I felt like i lost a partner, a duo and a person na takbuhan at kausap sa kahit anong bagay. I hate myself for feeling like this.
I know I wasn't always easy to love. I know my emotions sometimes turned into words that wounded instead of healed. But despite everything, a part of me still misses you.
Not just who you are now, but who you used to be. And sometimes, I wonder if you ever look back and miss us too. Because i fucking miss that.
Please do not reply for now. I just want to release this thoughts after seeing that random vid i created back in 2022 when we were still happy together.
I somehow would question myself if it’s too much. I wont beg for your time, or effort anymore. I will step back silently and let you feel the space where my love used to be.
Im tired of being the strong one when im falling apart too.
Have a nice day ahead at kumain ka please. Iloveyou 🫶🏻