Well... I'll start from the beginning, so to speak.
About six months ago, a friend of mine invited me to join a Discord server with his friends and acquaintances, and I agreed... I wasn’t exactly active there—I’d sometimes type a few words, but not often. One time, a girl joined the server, and one of the guys there started flirting with her even though she said she didn’t like it, so I got into a fight with that guy because, like... what the hell? She told him straight up she wasn’t interested, so why did he keep going? So, after a while, another girl who was also on that server messaged me and said she just wanted to get to know me. So we started chatting, and we became friends pretty quickly. We’d often just talk about random stuff and sometimes hang out together. A little later, she started sending me emojis for no reason, like “>:3” or “;3,” or GIFs where one bear cub nudges another’s cheek or something like that. well, I usually replied with something like “>w<” or “(⁄ ⁄•⁄ω⁄•⁄ ⁄)” and I don’t remember at what point she started sometimes calling me a good boy and I sometimes jokingly called her Your Majesty... Well, I think that’s about when I fell in love.
After a while, I was already thinking about telling her how I felt, but I didn’t do it because one of the guys on the same server told me she was already dating that guy I mentioned at the beginning of the story. I felt a bit disillusioned with life and fell into a mild depression, though I eventually came to terms with it. Although I still felt like something was drawing me to her. We barely talked for a couple of months, but recently we started talking again, and I’ll say right off the bat that, judging by everything, either she’s already broken up with that guy, or I was lied to back then about them being together. So anyway, we recently started talking again, and usually it was just random topics, but... One day I sent her a picture that said, “It’s Femboy Friday, give your local femboy a pat,” and that’s when it started. Well, to put it briefly, we started something like a role-playing game (don’t get the wrong idea—the most intimate thing that happened was a kiss on the cheek or a hug). And then we just kept flirting; she was, so to speak, in control. She’d put a tilde after every sentence or call me cute… Anyway, after that, I realized that I guess I still like her.
Well, over time, the flirting and role-playing got more intense (it even got to the point of kissing on the lips, heh). The only thing I didn’t really like was that she would sometimes play Roblox at the same time, which meant she’d reply a little less often, and eventually she’d stop replying altogether until our next conversation. One time I told her that I’d like it if, during our conversations, we were both focused on the conversation itself, but I didn’t blame her for anything—I blamed myself more (once I got distracted by a video game during a conversation)—and, like, yeah… and anyway, she replied, “Awhhh
I love you too-
Oh my god, I just said I love you >///<"
So then I told her how I felt about her, and we just sat there in an awkward silence...
After that, we started talking pretty often about how we love each other and stuff like that... we already know each other’s real names, and like, she knows I live in Ukraine and I know she lives in the US. We also decided that for now we won’t call ourselves a couple, but we’ll chat for a few more days and then decide. But every now and then she still gets distracted by Roblox during our conversations, which is a bit annoying because she always has “Do Not Disturb” mode on Discord, and until she minimizes Roblox, she won’t see if I’ve messaged her… Because of this, I sometimes feel ignored.
And I'm also a little worried that something might happen to her account again (since this is already her third Discord account). (I was thinking of suggesting we exchange emails—what do you think?) Or that she doesn't actually like me (her profile says, "Just a little warning, keep your heart guarded... Make it protected so when someone hurts you, it doesn't hurt as bad. I don't let people get close..... :>.")
I've already gotten pretty attached to her and don't want to lose her, so... tell me what you think, maybe give me some advice or something like that.