Did my ketamine therapy session unveil repressed memories/trauma?
I’m new to this type of therapy so I really don’t know what I’m doing or what any of this means, or what’s normal and what’s not normal and I don’t want to put more meaning into this than there is. But I’ve dealt with depression my whole life, with major depressive episodes every now and then. After my 2nd child was born, I fell into more and more MDD episodes, and they are severe. I just had my 2nd infusion today and after the drug wore off I couldn’t stop sobbing. I was in the infusion office for an hour, uncontrollably crying. Crying for myself, almost like I was trying to comfort my heart, which I felt like my heart had somehow been hurt. But the thought that popped into my head which resulted in the sobbing was “something happened to you.” I don’t know what that means, but I just have this heaviness and feeling like something horrible happened to me, and I don’t know what it is, but it feels extremely traumatic. And as I’m typing this I’m not crying any more but I’m shaking. Again, not sure if it’s just ketamine or what. But I don’t really know what to do with this feeling, or how to move forward.