Sometimes I wish I could look forward to go home
I'm just working in a different city for around a year now and before that used to study in a different city. Both the phases have had their highs and lows but one thing I have always noticed in people around me is something I cannot even fathom my imaginations to.
Whenever things got heavy, people rushed to their homes. Stressful exams, pack the bags and leave for home. A month full of heavy workload, fly back home. I don't know but for me things are just different. I envy people who have the capacity to feel that the last resort to deal with all their problems is just to go back home. For me since many years now it's always been exactly the opposite. I feel even more tired once I step into my house. The responsibilities seem to increase and sometimes I feel I have to put on even more fiasco than I put with the rest of the world to feel normal.
Lately, I have also seen a few of the friends travel back home in their birthday weeks because now since the clg life is over we don't have those massive celebrations where everyone is together. To escape from these memories they have home, but when I felt alone on my birthday, going back home wasn't even the last thought that sprouted in mind. It's like I can not tolerate being over exhausted and overwhelmed but am still better instead of going back home.
I wish I could feel that strong urge and warmth that a home provides to people to such extent that they just linger on the thoughts to go back whenever they get a chance.