WIBTAH if I paid for my own hobby?
For context, my husband and I aren't poor, but we aren't "living high on the hog" either. My husband's hobby is motorcycles. He has a very nice one. He paid somewhere between 5 to 7 thousand for it initially. It was a great deal. It has required some work here and there. He recently had to pay 700 to have something repaired on it.
I've recently gotten into the tcg game; collecting cards. The whole purpose was to see if I could turn them into a profit to help pay bills. I can only work part-time at the moment because of family issues. I'm looking into better jobs that work around our needs.
The goal is to contribute and collect some cards I like on the side. I recently made my first big sale. Close to 100 for 1 card. 🎉
Now, onto the drama. I found a graded card on sale for a STEAL. About 25 dollars, including shipping. I could easily turn it into a 30 profit. It would also be something I'd personally like to have for my collection. I've been working hard, so I started to think I deserved it. (My mistake) Also, I could always sell it if we needed the money.
I start to bring it up to my husband. Before I even get out half of what I'm saying, he cuts me off and tells me I can't buy it because we have bills coming up. His tone upsets me because I just made a completely free 100 dollars. The card I sold has been in my collection since I was a kid, so it was totally unaccounted for money in the first place. I didn't even get to tell him how much the card that I was considering cost or the profit it could make. He just completely shut me down by saying, "Make money, sure. But it doesn't do us any good if you spend it."
Would I be the asshole if I asked him, "Can I not have a hobby? Even if I pay for it myself?"
Honestly, I've met some cool people, and I've had a lot of fun since I got involved in this. I haven't gotten to enjoy something like this that's mine in a long time. I don't have a lot of time for my own fun anymore. I have to squeeze this in as it is.
Meanwhile, he just went on a long ride to a cool place with a friend (gas is expensive, yall!), and bought some small, but also kind of expensivy souvenirs. He rides whenever he can. To work, to the grocery store, or just a short ride. Occasionally, he takes a long one like recently. I don't want to make him feel bad. He deserves it for how hard he works, but a part of me wants to ask, "Don't I deserve to have something too? It's not like I'm spending hundreds of dollars." (Hint. Hint.)
His bike is better on gas than our vehicles, so there's that. It can be practical, but I feel like if I have to do without, why does he get to have his hobby? What makes him more deserving than me?
Am I just thinking childishly, being selfish or plain stupid? Half of me feels stupid, but the other half is kind of mad. Is all this stuff I'm feeling justified or an overreaction?