I wrote this down to see yours opinions
My ex(27M) broke up with me(24F) a few days ago. We have been together for 3 years. I have been asked him about our future in the first year, and he said we will get married this summer. This year I went abroad for half a year, and in March I felt extremely lonely. I asked him if we could get married earlier. He basically avoided this problem every time I asked; he was ignoring my messages even before I left. I got very nervous, and I kept arguing with him. Thus, in March, he said, maybe a partnership visa could help with my nervous. I said you promised this thing for three years, I don't trust you can make it. He did not. Later, his answer is that we argued again, and it made him feel sad, so he could not do anything.
Then he started to say he can arrange a trip to visit me for a few days in April. I was super happy and planning for it, but he never mentioned it again initially. In April, I asked when he would book the flight ticket. We looked for it, but then he said his family does not want him to go. He said he can not pay for the flight ticket if his parents don't support him. At that moment, I was getting crazy and exhausted. I asked him if he could do anything to prove that he is willing to and has the ability to construct a future with me. He said, "How about you return here and we go to the amusement park in the summer?" I said, " This is not a future planning thing". Then he ignored me again.
Then I started to ask him to reply to my messages, and say that my only hope and goal in my life is to have him. If he is not doing anything, then I am going to die. He still did not do anything for me but avoid me more and more, saying that I made him feel very unwell and depressed. In the end, he contacted my parents to ask them to manage me. I felt very angry, and I insulted him and his family, saying that he is a mommy boy and not a man. Then he disappeared altogether, not replying anywhere, and asked his father to talk to me.
Then, in the end, he broke up with me. He complains that he feels scared of my messages, which always argue with him and make him cry during the day. Back in March, he once said he had a nice day with his mother but when my messages arrived, it ruined their day and harassed him. He said the relationship made him depressed and unable to concentrate on his own things. What I claimed in April was too much for him to handle.
My complaint is that for at least a year, he barely sent messages to me initially. He promised a lot of things but when I brought it up, I was "forcing him". I prepared a lot of things for the things he promised, so it angered me. I was also depressed, and I thought he would support me. The thing in the April that he contacted my parents secretly, was hurting me in the way I told him what hurt me the most, because I told him at the beginning that I lost my best friend because my parents talked to her secretly. But he said he was just concerned about me.
In the past three years, I got used to him being part of my life, I got used to sharing things with him, thinking of him in the morning and at night. I felt completely lost and hopeless now that he had broken up with me. I tried to beg him not to leave, but he refused. I also understand I can not force someone to love me. But this thing really makes me feel that I am not deserving to be loved and to be treasured. His betrayal also reminds me of my best friend. I am not motivated by anything now anymore. My education and enjoyments are meaningless to me now. So maybe you could also give me some advice if you like.