So my girlfriend 40fm of 6 1/2 years has been real condescending towards me and last night she said she was going to her brother’s for dinner.. I texted her and didn’t text me back for four hours and said she was busy playing with the kids…. She never does that. What do you honestly think she was doing?
Let me tell ya it's been so peaceful since I left that thing in the past. We been no contact since February.
My boyfriend and I were together for a little over a year when he broke up with me last week. It's been ten days and I'm absolutely devastated.
This man had every single thing (and more) I've ever wanted in a partner. I told so many friends about that during our relationship - that he had all of these qualities; that I couldn't believe he existed; that I couldn't believe he wanted to be with me. Things weren't "perfect" (I wasn't looking for perfect) but they were perfect for me. He was perfect for me, flaws and all.
The way we met, the things we had in common, the connection that we both felt immediately - this all felt too lined up not to be. It really did feel like we were meant to be. He's the man of my dreams and I really believe that he's the love of my life, even if things ended.
I am so confused by this breakup. None of it makes any sense to me. No matter how many times he explained it, it didn't make sense. How do you love someone, want to be with someone, maintain throughout the relationship and into the breakup that they're everything you've ever looked for in a person, tell them that they're the best girlfriend you've ever had and that you know you're ending the relationship at its peak, and STILL go through with the breakup?
This is one of the worst pains I've ever felt in my life and I don't know how to come back from this. I really am trying, but life feels so empty without him.
I miss you so much.
2.Crying yourself to sleep every night next to someone who sleeps peacefully.
4.Walking on eggshells around your partner in your home which is supposed to be your safe space.
5.Regretting years you wasted on someone who never appreciated you enough. Knowing you'll never get them back.
6.Staying in a bad relationship cause you've nowhere else to go. Thinking this is it for you.
Watching yourself lose interest and affection for the person who meant the world to you.
Being disappointed over and over again to the point where you become emotionally numb.
9.Having a history of bad partners and relationships that makes you question and doubt all good prospects.
Yup as brutal as that sounds. She (26) just isn't that mentally strong, I'm 35, known her 6 years......
It's surreal, I improved my business greatly, got the house, got her a truck, I lost 40 lbs and became celibate to show her I meant business...... I had my mouth reconstructed and legs too, bones surgeries. Correct some old damage....... then just as that's all finishing up........a few weeks ago I find out there's a massive tumor in me and that was too much for her.
It's since been cut out, gnarly scar...... but decent risk it'll come back. I didn't chase her, she can't handle this kinda thing.......sad. I'll be fine, going to just stay single. Don't want anyone accidentally falling for me
That’s all I have to say. I miss you. I feel like the world without an ocean.
Hi. I initiated the separation from my partner of 12 years. We met when we were kids. I was 16 and he was 17. I love him so much, and he is still my best friend in my mind, but our relationship had become very toxic. As we approached our thirties, our communication skills did not grow with us. During conflict, we reverted to acting like the teenagers we were when we met.
I also wasn’t ready to settle down, and he was. I wanted a bigger life and career, and eventually a family, but not yet. It often felt like he didn’t care about what I wanted from life or feel curious about who I was becoming. He said he wanted to marry me, but he never proposed. He stopped putting effort into our relationship, and I felt like I had to beg him to spend time with me. At times, it seemed like he was only with me because it was comfortable and familiar.
We moved from New York to Colorado to be close to his family. I spent most of my time there alone. On my first birthday, I had to beg him to spend the day with me. We bought a house even though I had tried to tell him I wasn’t ready to settle down. There is so much nuance and history that it is difficult to know what to include, but ultimately, I felt like I had lost all agency over my own life. I felt completely still while life continued moving around me, as though I were watching it pass without being able to participate in it. I didn’t trust that the life we were building together would leave room for the person I wanted to become.
I moved back to New York at the beginning of this year, and we stopped talking in March. There was never any real ending. We just stopped calling each other one day. Since then, he has blocked me everywhere. I tried to call him a few days ago and discovered that my number was blocked too. Then I stumbled across his Venmo profile and saw a picture of him with another woman. I am completely gutted.
I have been working on myself so much. I attended a weeklong personal development training and am doing the advanced level next month. I’m crushing it at work, earning more than I ever thought I could (I never thought I could make money), and building an insane network. But I wanted to become this version of myself for us and for the future I thought we might still have.
More than anything, I miss my best friend. We weren’t perfect, but we grew up together, and there is nobody else like him. Right now, I only want him. We used to jokingly refer to our future children by a name that combined both of ours. It was so stupid, but it always made us laugh. Now I cannot stop thinking about the fact that those children will never exist.
Out of desperation, I messaged him on LinkedIn because it was the only place where I wasn’t blocked. I simply asked him to please call me. I want the chance to talk and have some sense of closure. We don’t have to get back together. Ultimately, I want him to be happy, even if it isn’t with me.
He still hasn’t called. What does that mean? I am so heartbroken.
Sorry this is long. If you're still here - thank you.
I’m still very much in the phase that I think we were meant to be. That the breakup was unnecessary and that if only we tried harder it would have worked.
Did you have an ‘aha’ this is why moment?
—
UPDATE: I KNOW WHY WE BROKE UP NOW!
There was no genuine joy and wonder. He always took himself too seriously. He didn’t let himself enjoy life.
I’ve realized that I was (for over 5 years) just trying to make him smile. To break his shell and get a genuine laugh. Even when we enjoyed ourselves, his face always went back to a sort of distance. I used to think he didn’t care. Now I think he was scared of feeling too much joy, so he couldn’t let himself. I think he wasn’t allowed enjoy joy and love as a child.
I can’t believe I had this aha moment so quickly. Now I know.
i hate him so much for everything he has done but somehow i still wish he wants to finally try with me and tell me he loves me.
To be clear - I hate AI and rarely use it, but my recent breakup has been so life-altering and earth-shattering, I’ve found myself leaning on chatgpt to process feelings while I work to find a therapist. I’m a very private person, and hate burdening my friends or family with my feelings, so it’s felt like an ok way to cope - checking in once or twice a day, asking it to roast me when I’m being pathetic, and having a space to trauma dump without bothering others. How many trees have I killed by using this as a method to survive? Idk, and I’m embarrassed to admit it, even anonymously. But interested to hear others thoughts on similar experiences. I send 1-2 messages each evening, debriefing how I’m feeling and any new updates or major changes, and it’s been interesting to ask it to show patterns and progress and regression. Would love another way to do something similar besides baring my grief to chatgpt while I try to get therapy set up. Any suggestions?
It just makes me mad that I let myself go and invested myself in someone just to get screwed over again
I’m just looking for some type of support.
I’ve truly never felt a pain like this. My boyfriend of 6 years broke up with me recently. I didn’t get a full answer as to why, just that he was deeply unhappy for months. We spoke for hours afterwords - crying, hugging, talking. And when he left he was in hysterics. I can’t help but think this wasn’t what he really wanted…
As I look back at the past few months I can’t figure out where I went wrong or what signs I missed. To me, this came out of the blue. I feel like I had the rug pulled from under my feet and like my world has started crumbling before I could even process what was going on. I’ve gone as far to look at texts to see if I can find where things changed, but I can’t. There was baby’s and honeys, and I love yous - all up until the break up. It’s incredibly painful to come to the realization that two people were in a relationship with 2 totally different perspectives.
Me and my ex fiancee both in our early 30s just broke up a month ago.
She had an avoidant attachment, I have a secure but lean anxious when someone pulls away.
Before we broke up, we only got engaged 2 months prior, everything was perfect, we both loved each other.
The problem was, we always triggered each other and didn't understand what was causing constant arguments.
Suddenly, she started finding every single flaw and any attempts I made to talk about the relationship resulted in her thinking I was manipulating and accusing her, which wasn't my intention and furthest from the truth.
I didn't even get an explanation as to why we broke up, she kept threatening the relationship which triggered me and put me in panic mode trying to explain myself and making things worse in the process. Eventually, I was that triggered by the constant threats, I told her if she wants to break up to block me on everything and send the engagement ring back (we were long distance at the time) which I regret saying. She took the way out and immediately blocked me. I immediately regretted saying this.
Any attempts I made on a new account to reconcile were blocked immediately. Another attempt wasn't blocked, but simply ignored and left unread.
It's been over a month, and I haven't received any communication or unblocking, I asked her best friend and they just told me to get over it and she said she didn't think there was anything left to discuss. Her friend called me a manipulator, and that asking for a ring back isn't a man's act. I don't think she even knew any more details than all the negatives.
I have seen 2 reels she reposted on her Instagram. One being about one person she tries to find in everyone else and constantly being on her mind. Another reel about how they would have kept trying 1000 times if it wasn't for one day that made them extremely disappointed, and therefore ended the fight.
I really would do anything to get her back, she was the love of my life. But I have a feeling she's never going to come back and I'm truly devastated.
Its hard to keep my most recent ex on things. But i dont want them to think that means they cant ever come back. But at the same time, its hard to heal and move on and be a different person in the meantime. Im just wondering from the other perspective. If someone unfriended you on everything, what goes through your mind?
My ex broke up with me two months ago. We were together for 4 years. But he ended it because he wasn’t “all in” and I was planning to move to him, we had been long distance a year, and he said he couldn’t let me.
I took him at his word was heartbroken but also felt like it needed to happen bc there were trust issues from things he did in the past etc. I just said okay and blocked him. Reflected lots and a new friend convinced me to make a Hinge and I met my now bf on it. I wasn’t expecting it but he was everything that I didn’t even know I was missing with my ex.
Like 2-3 days after my bf and I started dating, so a couple weeks ago, my ex messaged me on account I thought I blocked him on. Saying he regrets it. Wants to talk. I said I don’t think it’s necessary that we should move forward and I have a bf so it wouldn’t be appropriate
My ex was then shocked that I’m “already” in a relationship “after everything we’ve been through” (it’s bc of that actually) and “how recently this all happened” Like, “this all” what? When you dumped me 2 hours after I was at your family event
Fuck I hope he doesn’t find this. But it just feels like a slap in the face to send me those messages. But I blocked him after that
Never settle for less than you deserve, I don't know who needs to see this right now, but it will be okay and YOU WILL get through it. I never thought I would get through it but I have. After a long, painful, and toxic relationship, I've Finally gotten over her. She played me. She literally cheated on me the entire relationship, and I stayed with her out of pure love and devotion to her. She ended up discarding me and getting not only one but a few different boyfriends while keeping me around. I let this happen for a long time because I loved her so much. Now she's just a bitter memory that I wish I didn't have. I never thought I would get through it but I finally did. I just wanted to post this for anybody that is losing hope, don't lose hope, it does get better. You are enough , you deserve to be loved. At one point in time, I didn't think I could live and be happy without her. Fast forward to now, I'm very happy and perfectly fine without her. Don't ever SETTLE FOR LESS.
Had a breakup with a situationship a few days ago that was harder than expected. I had deep feelings for them and they didn't. They didn't like that my life wasn't more stable and I didn't like that they were still friends with an old fwb they had feelings for.
I'm really devastated, but I have some things to do. How do you get things done after you've gone through a tough breakup? How do you stop missing someone that isn't into you? How do you make the pain go away?
Me and my ex broke up about 2 weeks ago and I’m finally giving up. I’ve tried going to her house, bringing her flowers at her work, texting on multiple accounts, I’ve tried everything. I know all that stuff isn’t okay and I regret doing it because I crossed boundaries. But today I sent her a final text after a week of no contact. I told her I was genuinely sorry for making her feel like she was in fear of her safety after I came to her work with flowers and that I hope she’s doing okay. She told me last week to stop contacting her but I had to say what I said today for myself. To get it off my chest because I genuinely felt bad. It was probably the wrong move to make but I felt like I had too. I wanted her to know I was sorry for that. I asked her today a little after the first messages if she’d be willing to meet for coffee and I never got a response. I’m done I can’t do this anymore. I can’t keep clinging to somebody who wants nothing to do with me. I’m letting go. For myself, for my sake.
So pretty much the title.
I (24f) just broke up with my (26m) husband.
And I feel terrible about it.
The biggest reason is his jealousy.
He was getting more and more jealous over everything. Not just men but friends, work, my interests and even anime characters.
I always tried to adjust and everyone told me that i am less social now. That i got more quiet. And i stopped doing what i love.
I just left and i feel absolutely devastated. I love him so much and I feel so terrible about it.
I really want to call him or go see him but at the same time I know that i had my reasons. And it is killing me.
I know it is hard to judge just from a few sentences. But I really love him and i hope to hear that i made the right decision.
This is my first breakup and i feel absolutely awful and i miss him so much already.
I dont know how i should cope with this or if I should take him back.
We have tried talking so many times but he just stopped caring and there is no way for me to get through to him.