Attended my first Divine service this morning. Ecclesiastical Anxiety
The other day I posted looking for a church in DFW that offered weekly communion and jad a traditional worship service.
I have never been baptized or been a member of a church but have always believed in the word of God. I have sinned against God greatly in my life even after knowing better and attempting repentance. Recently I became drawn to find a church to join, be baptized and partake in the Eucharist. I attended a couple Greek Orthodox churches and loved tje Divine Liturgy and reverance that was seen and felt there. Not to mention how beautoful tje churches are with all the paintings of icons and Bible stories. That being said, the veneration of Icons and Marianism give me concern. I found the LCMS after searching for churches with alignment of early church traditions, and communion.
So I made it to my forst Divine Service this morning. It was nice.
Here are some thoughts.
My first time hearing a pipe organ (in person), very cool. Following along with the hymnals definitely proved difficult for a layperson lol.
There were some children who were being confirmed so I was able to witness that process. They must have been baptized at some prior point. I followed a long in the book so I could see the questions/statements they were being asked to confess. The only thing that gave me pause was in regards to statement about believing in the full scope of the Lutheran doctrine (paraphrasing).
The communion was beautiful. Members came to a circular rail around the altar to kneel and receive it. Next time I will go up with arms crossed as I saw others do for a blessing. When I went to the Orthodox church they allow going up after service to get some of the blessed bread which I did.
I enjoyed listening to the pastors sermon, I had already listened to a few of his sermons on the drive up they had posted on their website and thought they were great. This is Our Redeemer LC in Dallas BTW.
An older woman who sat behind me greeted me after service and asked if I was visiting, I had all the pamphlets. I told her I was seeking a church, she was kind and reccomemded this one in high regard. She was the only one who really spoke with me.
I grabbed some coffee and hit the road. I listened to the other sermons available in tje website on tje way home and they were great as well.
I plan to go back next Sunday. Hopefully I can attend bible study as well and meet the pastor if he is the one who leads it.
I got a copy of the small catechism today and read that as well as a pamphlet titled A Simple Explanation of Church History. I now plan to get a copy and read the large catechism and then the book of Concord
Please let me know any thoughts or advice.
Im definitely struggling with what I have found out is called ecclesiastical anxiety (fear of choosing the wrong church and not being saved)
I'm in a hurry to find a church and make peace with my decision because I want to be baptized and receive communion ASAP. I'm approaching my mid 40s and have been called to seek and live in repentance.