I hate my bully
I was going through old photos and I kept seeing the “friend” who bullied, harassed, and assaulted me. My heart rate jumped every time and I felt… almost afraid or maybe nervous? Idk I think I might have some PTSD. I didn’t get any support before or after the incident. Before the incident happened my parents and friends shrugged it off or flat out ignored me despite me saying how uncomfortable and anxious he made me feel. And then once the incident happened my parents didn’t say anything and my friend group self destructed for a completely different (and incredibly stupid and petty) reason, and nobody said anything to me. I wasn’t seeing my therapist at the time either.
This guy had been insinuating that I was ugly, stupid, and unlikeable for months. He made gross comments comparing the size and shape of my body to his. He would literally scream and yell at me if I said or did something he didn't like. One time everyone was getting on to him for being an asshole and I was pissed so I put my fist down on the table and he **screamed at me and only me.** Not the people who were telling him to stop being an asshole, **just me**. And then nobody said or did anything, they didn't tell him off for screaming at me, nobody stood up for me.
One day I finally cracked and started telling him off. He fucking threw a chair, grabbed me and hit me, and then fell on the floor and cried when I didn't back down from telling him how much of a piece of shit he was. What made it worse was that the reason he hit me was because I was standing up for “our” other friends he was bragging about harassing. But nobody stood up for me when he had yelled and screamed and insulted me when everyone was watching. Those friends I stood up for barely talked to me afterwards. The people who watched me get bullied and assaulted went on like nothing happened. My ex, whose birthday it was, COMPLAINED ABOUT **NOT GETTING PRESENTS** AFTER WATCHING ME GET **ASSAULTED**. My ex is FUCKING 18.
Why the hell did nobody care about how I was being treated, why did everyone forget about me getting assaulted and just move on without a word? **Why was I standing up for people when I was the one getting bullied?**