My partner and I have a 8 month old daughter and have had some issues with his mum and sister since she's been born
- When I was in hospital after I had given birth, I had trouble sleeping and was so sleep deprived I was hallucinating. I cancelled all visitors for the following day so I could rest. This was the day his mum was meant to meet our baby. His mum and sister messaged to say that we ruined "her moment" and it was "unfair". We told them we would be happy for them to visit the following day, but MIL didn't want to because she had plans. When we came home, I received a paragraph message from SIL about how angry they were at my partner for cancelling the visit. I can't get past this as I felt like they made the whole moment about them and how they felt, but no one seemed to care what I was going through.
- SIL was holding baby a few months ago who started to get fussy. My partner asked for the baby back but she said no. He asked 3 more times and she kept saying "no, you get her all week". I got annoyed and said to him that I wanted to leave. He told her once more to give the baby back, and when she did, she stormed off to her room crying. She said that we've trusted her before when the baby was fussing but not this time and it was offensive. I said it's not about trust, we are the parents, and when we ask for our baby, she comes back to us. MIL started arguing with us, saying we are being disrespectful and in the wrong, blah blah blah. His SIL has still not spoken to us after this incident and it's been almost 4 months. MIL still constantly brings it up and reminds us how we were in the wrong and we should not ask for our baby back if she's not hysterically crying.
- MIL constantly talks about me through our baby, being condescending and rude
- MIL has said she doesn't like our babies name and mostly refers to her as "the baby"
Due to this, any many other reasons, I've been distant from his family. I'm due to go back to work 2 days a week in a few months and the plan was for MIL to look after our baby. I'm lucky enough where I don't have to go back to work, but it would still help out financially if I did.
I'm tossing up whether to go back or not, since I feel like our boundaries have not been respected and it seems like we get criticised for every decision we make.
What would you do?