u/Dark-Humor-Addict

I am 4 days post op from my hysterectomy. I honestly don’t know how to feel.
I went in for a c section. Baby was breeched. Found that I had placenta accreta. No other way but to have the hysterectomy to save my life as there was too much blood loss and it wasn’t stopping.
This was my first success pregnancy. My first child. And now the option for more is just???? Gone!… in the blink of an eye. Everything was going fine. Baby came out fine. But then.. my future is just, changed?
I keep coming back to that. I no longer have a choice.

Recovery has been hell. I’m in pain. Can barely get out of bed, keep having fevers spike. I’m exhausted.

What’s done is done though... just wondering what my future will look like now.

Also, does sex life change???

Now, I know this might sound like I’m bat sht crazy but please bear with me.
I am 33w. And I absolutely cannot do this anymore.
Since the very beginning of this pregnancy, it has been hell.
At 9w- SCH bleed almost lost her
13W- cervix shortened.
16w cerclage (CONSTANT PAIN AFTER, no joke I regret this stitch but I know it was placed for a good reason)
21&23ish to 24w- anatomy scan shows sign of cystic kidney, SFGR, bowel obstruction. Started weekly scans and growth scans every 3w.
Each weekly appointment is back and forth with “we don’t know what’s going on or we can’t clearly see. May be a cystic kidney, may be missing. Attempted amniocentesis THREE TIMES and failed.
28w-possible partial bladder obstruction
From there on, we have been fighting for more answers. And have yet to get anything. Meanwhile, the bladder remains enlarged. I’m talking big black hole on your ultrasound. But they’re not doing anything about it but monitoring. We have confirmed she has ONE WORKING KIDNEY. I’m in constant panic mode that delaying any action is going to damage this kidney and I have no idea what I’m going to do then. So now my question is… given everything that’s going on.. would I be absolutely insane to advocate for an early delivery to fix this bladder issue before it’s too late? Is this even possible? I am at my breaking point. I am a FTM and I feel like something needs to be done 😭