r/pregnant

Well the title says it all. I’ve had a hunch this week (Wednesday) because I always set his alarms for him when he’s falling asleep for bed but that night I was doing it & he he asked me what I was doing on his phone when he saw it in my hand. I thought that was a weird thing to say because he never cares if I have his cellphone. We’ve been together for years & the last time we broke up, 3 years ago he was seeing this a girl named Jessica. They had sex & it was unprotected because she was claiming she may be pregnant by him (I saw his messages with her in 2023) I was also seeing other people. We both decided we wanted to get back together for our then 8 year old & leave the past behind. Back to the present, I decided after the comment he made I was going to look at his phone that night & see what made him act so funny. Sure enough his Instagram app was deleted, which is WEIRD we always message one another funny videos on that app & we both actively use it to talk when he works so no reason to delete it.. sure enough I re install it & open it & there she was. Jessica with a message thread. 2 unread messages waiting, the thread had disappearing messages turned on. So I could only see that day. I saw flirting between them both, him saying “I’m sorry I couldn’t see you but I’ll try this Sunday “ & another of her sending a pic of her body. Then he sent one of himself. Clothes on. THIS TIME. I immediately started crying & freaking out. I just couldn’t believe what I was reading. I felt gut punched. He was making plans to see her? Why? My baby shower is this Saturday. Anyway I confronted him & he said it was a mistake & a “hiccup” & he doesn’t know what he was thinking. He said it was over with. I had no choice but to believe him & go to sleep. Or try. I didn’t sleep much that night. Next morning, he left for work at 5am. The usual. I checked his Instagram on his laptop to see if he really meant he was not going to speak to her & guess what? He messaged her and said “sorry my girl is on me” she said “yea I know” & then he literally said “I do want to see you & be intimate trust me but I don’t think it’s possible & I don’t want to hurt my fam.” She said “I’ve waited 3 years for you & I’ll wait months or years anytime you want to come back but you always do this to me. I still accept you & I had a hard time getting over you after 3 years.” He said “I accept you too but it really can’t work unless it’s discreet” when I tell you reading that absolutely made me spiral. I could not believe instead of breaking it off he was just apologizing for ME catching them & saying it can’t work UNLESS they hide it better.” Then she sent him her phone number and said to use what’s app to talk. Then the messages went silent. Of course I know they took the conversation to what’s app. I’m not an idiot but I did not have access to that app since it’s on his cellphone & he was working at the moment but I cried so much & could only imagine what they were talking about now. Not only that she knows about me & that I am about to have his baby I’m due November 20th & she still wants to talk to him & is more than willing to be sneaky with him. They both make me feel like I’m a big dumb idiot pregnant girl who is crying trying to keep my family together & they’re acting as if I’m the issue.. anyway I confronted him AGAIN after work & he said the usual he’s “sorry” he doesn’t know what he’s thinking but how hurt I was really is hurting him & he doesn’t want to lose me so he really is done with her & he is really cutting her off. Again I have no other choice but to let it go. I’m pregnant almost due, no job, we share a jeep suv & he drives a my gold Camry to work (it’s not in the best shape bc he doesn’t take care of it) but the jeep was gifted to us by his sister for our Family & I take great care of it. I do all the maintenance & keep up with the oil changes, keeping it clean, etc. but it’s technically not mine. I can’t move anywhere because I don’t have any money & I can’t stay with my parents because my sister is currently moving in with her again to save money. There’s no room for me. I feel very trapped. But that’s not the end of it. I knew he wasn’t done talking to this girl Jessica because she actively seeks him out when he doesn’t reply (in the past I saw this) & she just went radio silent? I didn’t believe it. Well last night I checked his photos and he had 3 photos that were saved from what’s app. One his a selfie of him at work that I never got. The other is his work site, & the last was a nude of his hard penis. THAT IS WHEN I WENT CRAZY. I began to sike out. He was in bed & I woke him up & said I knew you weren’t telling me truth why are you sending her these pictures why are you naked? Why?! Why! WHY!!! & he took the naked pic of himself when I was at my best friends house & it was in OUR bathroom. My thing is, what were they texting about for him to become so aroused ? She makes him so sexually aroused that he took a picture and shared it with her & we’ve had makeup sex 2 times after the first argument because I was so emotional & I just wanted to feel loved. But no, he wants her. It feels like I am now the issue & im getting in the way of them seeing each other & it feels like he is going to see her one way or another now. I mean I can’t keep stalking his cellphone everytime I see now it’s escalating into something more & more & im looking like a fool. I want advice now. I know I want to break up with him. I know this means he doesn’t love me because I cried so much my belly became so tight. I didn’t eat or sleep much this week & I even felt suicidal last night. What do I do? I have no options & it feels like that’s why he chose to cheat on me right now because I am stuck & I can’t leave because I’m so pregnant. I feel so betrayed and sick. I can’t even look him the same anymore. He apologized again but I don’t trust a word he says. He seems to really like this girl & I feel like I am the problem. Please someone tell me why he would do something like this to me when I’ve been loyal and pregnant. That’s all.

As the title says, I’d love to hear about the weirdest symptoms you experienced that made you suspect you were pregnant! :D

I’ll go first!

Left knee pain.

During my first pregnancy (which sadly ended in a miscarriage), I had no idea that the sudden, unexplained pain in my left knee could have anything to do with being pregnant.

Fast-forward to a few days ago, when I conceived for the second time, and guess what? The exact same weird knee pain came back!

This time, I recognised it straight away and somehow just knew I was pregnant, a full five days before getting a positive test.

So, tell me your weirdest, most unexpected early pregnancy symptoms!

So to start off I’ve just found out I’m pregnant (about 6 weeks) and to give some history I have one daughter and one son, with my daughter I was extremely sick throughout my entire pregnancy, hyperemisis the whole pregnancy literally until she was out, with my son I wasn’t sick at all, I know 6 weeks is extremely early but I also know other people who have had the same experience (HG with their girl and fine with their boy) can anyone else weigh in? I’m not really hoping for anything in particular I’m just genuinely curious about others experiences and any opinions would be appreciated!! 🫶

Trigger warning: mention of drugs and addiction.

So Ive posted here many times but for this post I wanna add for context that I’m turning 18 in December and im 19 weeks along today.

I’ve had to cut contact with my bestfriend (17) because she relapsed once again, she’s been clean from all kinds of drugs for about 5 months or so till yesterday where she smoked weed.

Which is totally fine for me and out of my control, usually I would keep in contact with her and try to guide her out of it and try to keep her away from other kinds of drugs but now that I’m pregnant I want my baby to have the best people around and no drugs whatsoever in its life.

She’s used all kinds of drugs as she fell into addiction at only 15 and was on the run multiple times last year and the year before doing whatever one does then, I had to cut contact with her once or twice then too and we didn’t become friends again until almost a year later both times where she was clean again due to how she changed as a person and she put my sister(16) in danger and tried to make her relapse too.

I don’t know if this was harsh and just straight out mean of me to do, I didn’t want to but now that I’m having a baby I want only the best people and environment for my child and us.

I feel so sad and like I’m the most horrible friend ever because what friend does that?! And especially since I always try to help her and keep her clean, she’s been and is so excited to be an auntie and I just feel so horrible and like I ruined that for her now.

Can someone please tell me if it was the right choice or not because I’m spiraling and my heart feels broken for our friendship once again and for her & her wellbeing because I want her to be clean and healthy & happy.

I have had a constant headache behind my eyes/forehead and at the top of my head for about 2 weeks now, along with severe congestion. I went to an urgent care, tested negative for covid, and was prescribed Cefdinir to treat sinus infection. While my congestion has improved some (now on day 5 of 10 of antibiotic), my headaches haven't gotten any better.

I'm taking Tylenol as often as I can but it's not really helping either, and I worry about taking it for too long while pregnant. I also sleep elevated, do a warm compress on face, use a humidifier and peppermint oil, etc.

I am calling my OB tomorrow, but in the meantime (to those who have had a similar experience), is there a supplement or something else I can take for the headaches? It's waking me up at night and I'm desperate for some relief.

our baby boy will be here in less than 3 weeks and i’m having a hard time landing on his middle name, his first name will be apollo. his brothers (half brothers but brothers none the less) both have names that go together. ikaika and kimani. and now my family is telling me my baby will feel left out since his name is not like theirs with a “k” in it. anyways the names im stuck between are apollo lee, apollo kai, and apollo knox. i’m really liking apollo kai but apollo lee has family significance which would be the only reason i’d give him that middle name. any advice or opinions are appreciated 💙

I recently found out that I’m pregnant and I suffer from moderate eczema that ruins my skin barrier and ultimately causes folliculitis. I have finally found a solution to my skin problems, Zoryve (roflumilast), but there isn’t enough data on use during pregnancy to determine if it is safe. I also use skincare products with growth factors in them. Those of you that suffer from these conditions or have used these products pre-pregnancy, what did you use during pregnancy?

US Based.

Yay, low risk for genetic disorders and he's a boy. But geez I wasn't expecting it to cost so much. Not only have I hit my health insurance deductible for the year, but I am on a financial assistance plan with the healthcare system my OB is with. Hindsight I feel stupid, but I didn't realize the test was done by a third party vendor until I got the paper on how to see the results- after my blood was drawn. But hey, it labs, so if it's out of pocket, it would be a max of a couple hundred, right?

Not only is it a third party vendor, but it's an "out of network" provider. Meaning my insurance won't cover ANY of the cost.

I plan to talk to Natera (provider who did the test) to see about financial assistance and/or self pay discounts. But we had a plan to pay off all our debts and put more into savings before my due date, and if I have to pay this in full it will derail that plan.

I'm just so frustrated with myself because:

1. The test was basically unnecessary for us, as we aren't high risk for anything. My last pregnancy was a MMC so this was mainly done for reassurance.

2. I should have checked with my insurance first, granted any time I try to get a cost estimate with them they give me the same vague line of "well first it applies to your deductible, then x% of your coinsurance" and can never give me a direct number range.

3. I'm sick of always feeling like any time I go to actually use my health insurance, that their main goal is to screw me over.

My husband and I are having our first child and we want to wait until the baby is born to find out the sex. Most people have expressed shock at this and multiple people have told us it’s not possible and we are making things much more difficult for ourselves. I don’t really see how but I wanted to see the experiences of people who have done this and if you are glad you did or regretted it. I don’t really plan to rush to have the nursery done and our nursery theme will be the same regardless. Nothing we really need to buy so early is “gendered,” so I’m just not understanding how it makes a difference. Thanks!

My husband and I decided we would tell people out babys name as soon as we had the gender. So far no one has had anything negative to say which I know is often what happens when you start telling people the name.

But I am starting to regret telling people because all they are getting for the baby are things with his name ALL OVER IT. I have blankets, shirts, sweaters, bags, and now a hamper. All with his name embroidered or printed on it(some are even ai generated which I hate to say I probably won’t use). It was cute at first but I really just don’t like his name on everything.

It feels super silly to be annoyed about because I do love his name but it just feels so corny after the 10th gift with his name on it. My MIL is the biggest culprit, she sent us a picture today of yet another blanket with his name printed on it and AI cartoon dinosaurs.

I have been grateful and not shamed anyone though, I know they are just as excited as we are and I don’t want anyone to feel bad for something so simple.

I feel like an old person shaking my fist at the cloud for even saying this, but I kind of hate that most baby retail and maternity wear has been relegated to mostly online shopping. Maybe I'm old fashioned or something, but it really bums me out that all maternity clothing is only sold online these days, and baby sections in the stores are relatively small. There was a store called Baby Depot in my city when my first child was born 5 years ago, and it has since closed down and there is nothing like it anywhere close to where I live. I didn't shop there for everything, but I really liked that there was a huge selection of literally anything you might need for a baby.

As for clothing, I generally dislike shopping for clothes online because I never know if I'm going to like the texture of the material, or if what I'm ordering is even going to fit me properly, or sometimes things look good on the model in the photo but wouldn't look good on my body type and it's hard to know until I actually try it on. I know a lot of moms these days just wear their regular clothes and just let their bellies show, but I'm a plus size mom in her 30’s who would never be comfortable with that.

Again - I feel like a ranting old person, but I really miss the days of being able to go out and shop in person for the things you need!

I know this probably sounds stupid but I’m so tired of family members calling my child I’m carrying their baby. Or thinking that they are just going to be watching and keeping my child all the time even going as far as saying oh it’ll be free childcare for when they think I’m returning to work (which I’m not). I’ve even told them that I wouldn’t be returning to work but oh well I’m just going to get the baby anyway and you’ll just be home by yourself. Or putting me down for the thought of staying home because bills exist. Honestly it’s starting to feel like a threat and my mental health can’t take the stress and thoughts of people possibly coming into my home thinking that they’re just gonna take my child away.

I heard some different people mention that people are preparing kegel exercises and perenial massage to avoid tears? Is this common?

How has your mental health been since you got pregnant?

I have been so even-keeled and just.. happy. Honestly before pregnancy I’d have mood swings every few weeks and it was pretty awful. Since getting pregnant, the mood swings have mostly just disappeared. I’m in an overall good mood almost all the time. I mean, I definitely have anxiety about the pregnancy and get stressed with work situations sometimes etc - but in general it feels like I’m in my own bubble of happiness right now.

But everyone is different. How is yours? 🙏🏽

(Just know that feeling any sort of way is okay)

37 years old, 9 weeks pregnant. So far, this has been very hard. I feel nausea, I am dizzy, I am tired, I have cramps (yesterday they were so bad I wanted my partner to call the emergency room) my boobs have been hurting terribly for months now, I am tired of having to eat all the time (mostly healthy) because if I dont I feel even sicker. I guess I naively hoped I wont feel THIS bad. I am taking pills (Xonvea) for the nausea on full dose, but in the last week it feels like it has gotten worse a notch. I have no real consciousness that this is gonna result in a baby, so I cant use that motivation to try to accept my state. I guess my age is a factor here. Oh and I hate men now, what a useless pile of flesh. I totally understand why I wanted to wait until going for this. Wish I could be the father honestly. I was a 100% pro choice before this, now I am even more so if possible. I hope I feel better in the second trimester, but one never knows! I just wanna cry. My partner is absolutely supportive and stuff, but he cant make me feel better. It is my body going thru this. If you feel similarly, I feel for you. Hugs.

Here’s what I plan to pack. I’m a FTM so please let me know if anything is unnecessary! One thing I will say is I would 1000% rather bring something that’s a maybe and not use it than not bring it and regret (had that happen many times at the hospital) but open to your thoughts :)

Slippers
pillows
blankets
chargers
portable chargers
flip flops for shower
deodorant
face wash
hair brush
tooth paste
tooth brush
shampoo/conditioner
face wash
lotion
floss
non-negotiable skincare
maternity pads * check with hospital
disposable underwear *check with hospital
perineal bottle UPSIDE DOWN KIND
nightgowns
comfy underwear
hair clip
fan
going home outfit (C-section friendly!)
going home outfit baby
car seat
snacks
water bottle
hair ties
chapstick
body wash
hair bonnet
eye mask
white noise machine
swaddle
my robe
Heating pad
ear plugs
plastic bag for wet/dirty clothes

Unfortunetely, I developed a thrombosis and have to take strong blood thinners during pregnancy. This means I am at a much higher risk for developing spinal hematoma during an epidural and it is very likely that I won't be able to get one. I've always planned on giving birth with an epidural, now I'm terribly afraid of the pain. Has anybody else been in this situation? How have you handled it or plan on handling it?

Currently in early labor in my induction. I made it about 3 very painful strong contractions before asking for pain medicine (honestly thought I would have lasted longer but no shame) and wanted to share my experience for those that are worried/scared.
The placement was uncomfortable and slightly painful but I'll tell you what.... it was not as painful as any of those contractions and I slept soooooo good and am now able to relax especially with having a catheter and not having to get up to pee every hour. You won't even remember the pain for the epidural. I can still feel pressure and my legs and toes just feels tingly like everything has fallen asleep but im so much more relaxed.
Good luck mamas we got this!

I’m 21 weeks and starting to get a little anxious about how big/uncomfortable I’m going to be by the end of pregnancy lol.

At my anatomy scan, baby girl was already about 1 lb and measuring in the 91st percentile for overall growth. My husband was almost 10 lbs at birth, so naturally my brain is now convinced she’s going to follow in his footsteps. He’s also half Polynesian, and big babies definitely run in his family.

Meanwhile, I’m only 5’3 and I already feel like I look 35 weeks pregnant. My back is starting to hurt and I keep thinking, how am I supposed to do this for another 19 weeks??

Mostly just here to rant because I’m getting anxious about being absolutely huge and miserable toward the end, and I’m also nervous that if she keeps measuring big I’ll end up needing a C-section. Someone with a big baby at the anatomy scan come calm me down 😂

I’m a supervisor at my work and my manager showed me texts today from an employee complaining about me cutting back on the amount of days working. The texts were to another subordinate who then sent screenshots to my manager. I am really struggling with the first trimester and have recently reduced my days at work for the time being for the sake of my health and my baby’s.

The text was quite long just bashing me,
and honestly made me feel like shit. I am very upset and uncomfortable being a supervisor to this employee now. Any advice on how to move forward with this?