How do I (25F) deal with my boyfriend's (24M) lack of ambition, interest, and hobby
I have a lot of goals, interests, and hobbies in life and I've made it my life's purpose to enjoy those things. I got with my boyfriend around 3 years ago and at the first 3 months everything was fun.
We engaged in skills together, we had the same interests, and we just did everything together. After those months we began focusing on our academics (college at the time) and we didn't have enough time to do anything else together. So individually, we did our own things.
I got into tennis and painting, and read more books. I also go out a lot because of these (even if I was alone and did not do these with friends). He mainly focused on his studies and did not get anything new. And that was fine for me.
But after years, he was still the same. I could say this because the week before his graduation he was still worried about an essay he forgot to pass (which could have added about 5% to his grade). Mind you, he has one of the highest gpas in his batch.
At that point I worried that maybe his lack of other things to worry about makes him more fixated on this thing. This "thing" that is already over and will add little to his life. I talked to him about the essay of course but he was more and more worried about it and basically I couldn't help.
After that, we both got some temp jobs at different companies (and different fields). I was able to keep my hobbies and even gained more (I started crocheting lately) all the while working towards my personal ambitions.
Then we switch to him and he has nothing.
His ambitions became a blur to me when he started working. I was confused what he was interested in now that he's out of school. I couldn't understand why he refused to do anything in his spare time.
I talked to him to maybe try something new with me and he still refused.
I feel a great sense of disappointment. It's not my job to worry what he does in the long run or push him to do things (but I feel that it is). But I feel upset at the thought of spending my whole life watching him rot in his bed and doomscrolling– calling it his hobby and interest.
At this point my head and heart aches on what to do next. Do I even need to do anything? How do I go about this situation?