Would this pattern concern you from an HR perspective? [IL]
My spouse is a sr. admin assistant who supports multiple directors and their teams. Her main boss is one director. There is another director she does NOT directly report to who has become increasingly controlling and micromanaging toward her.
Examples:
- changes documents AFTER she completes them, then says the work is “unsatisfactory” and cc's her boss
- modifies or deletes her work, then criticizes the result
- deletes/trims parts of her emails from threads when replying with the boss copied
- assigns huge projects with aggressive deadlines--the projects seem unnecessary or made up
- demanded she come into the office on a remote Friday for a task that could easily be handled remotely
- schedules unnecessary meetings for things already explained in writing
- monitors her calendar and questions declined meetings
- denies conversations that literally happened minutes earlier
- some days sends 10-12 emails with various tasks and demands
- acts like her direct manager even though he is not
- told her to print documents and have them physically delivered to his desk by a specific time
Her actual boss loves her work ethic and the work she completes. She has been with the company for 15 months, and was recently transferred to this department and really working hard to prove herself. Her actual boss is kind and not a micromanager, and sits in his office most days in meetings or working on his computer. He is newer to this department in recent 2 years and came from Dubai. He seems oblivious to what is happening and probably does not read many of the email chains that the other director is constantly bombarding him with.
Individually, some of these emails sound “normal.” Together, it feels like:
- control
- moving goalposts
- public correction
- rewriting history
- intimidation
- creating work/problems unnecessarily
She wants to bring this up professionally to her boss without sounding emotional or difficult, but she is struggling because many of the individual emails could look like typical admin requests if viewed separately.
From an HR/management perspective, does this overall pattern sound concerning to others? Has anyone dealt with someone who behaves like this?
The hard part is that it feels harassing in nature but difficult to “prove” because each individual incident can sound minor by itself. Other people in the office have apparently had similar experiences with this person over the years. My spouse has heart issues and I'm afraid of the effects this is having on her health. It's hard to watch. We don't know how to handle this istormenting.