Needing some advice
Hi, (23f) I’ve been poly for a while but I still feel new to polyamory. I’m currently in a relationship with my now girlfriend (23f), and she is in a relationship with me and two others who are all three VERY new to polyamory. (One is more of a situation-ship and not official quite yet)
I’m having a hard time because she just told me that she has been sexually active with both other partners, but she’s made her boundaries clear that she doesn’t want that with me.
And I am not mad that she doesn’t want that with me or that she’s not attracted to me, since nobody can control attraction. But I’m feeling hurt. I don’t know how to move forward, or feel better, or find out what my needs are in this instance.
We’re both Demisexual so out of anyone, I know sex doesn’t equal love and I don’t need it, but I’m still a little heartbroken that our connection feels like it’s not as deep as her other ones. I can’t help but feel as if she loves them more or that I’m a glorified friend to her.
Jealousy and insecurity has been a big hurdle for myself to conquer, so it’s felt like my fears have come to fruition.
I’m going to talk to her about how I’m feeling, but I told her I need to figure myself out before continuing.
If someone has any advice or recommendations, I would greatly appreciate it, thank you in advance, I’m on a throwaway since I didn’t want anyone irl to know it’s me