Ending process with failure, but with peaceful mind.
TW: living child.
In March, I asked on the sub how to finish the process and accept failure. I was spiralling because of poor results of my ER. This ER finished with one morula that failed to implant.
We visited doctor, who told that the dose of meds were too low and we can try again. Doctor was right, we started again and retrieved 9 eggs. 5 were mature and they all didn't make it - stopped at day 3.
And at this moment, I can finally feel that I am done. I feel peace - no more ERs, no more transfers. I can have my life back, without all these procedures and waiting. I will enjoy it without guilt and pressure that the clock is ticking, I am getting older and I have to try harder to get pregnant with second baby.
My body was through a lot - 3 ERs, miscarriage of twins, 3 transfers, C-section. My living daughter is our rainbow child, our successful second transfer. I can hold a child and feel that love at least once in my life. I am incredibly grateful for that.