Another assault on the U-Bahn, another crowd just watching
Hey first of all what is wrong with people here in berlin and germany for never stepping up to help someone? Or is that only my experience?
I (21F) have lived in Berlin my whole life. Over the last five years, I’ve unfortunately experienced frequent sexual harassment and assault by men here.
Sometimes it’s 'just' catcalling and comments about my body, but other times guys take it way too far like touching me or getting dangerously close to my face while saying disgusting things and so on
Yesterday, I was at uni until 9:30 PM. I usally have a long way home so it sucks especially because I always need to be scared something happens. While I was sitting on the U-Bahn, a group of three men (all taller/larger than me, likely in their late 20s or early 30s) boarded the train. I wasn't completely alone, there were other passengers, including a group of women sitting right next to me. The men were being quite loud, but I just ignored it because honestly that's nothing new for Berlin even so late people are gonna be loud.
Eventually the group of women got off at their stop. As soon as they left the men moved over to my section and sat down right next to and across from me. I immediately felt incredibly uncomfortable and panicked. I didn't know what to do.
Sould I stand up and leave? (Which would mean physically squeezing past them because they were blocking all the space). Or should I just sit still, look down and pretend to be invisible so they wouldn't notice me?
While I was frozen trying to decide the guy next to me turned to me and said:
"Was macht so ein schönes kleines Ding wie du noch so spät hier draußen?" (What is a beautiful little thing like you doing out so late?)
Another one chimed in: "Vor allem allein. Wer weiß was passieren könnte." (And all alone. Who knows what could happen.)
That was the moment where I knew i should have left.
Then the guy next to me suddenly started touching my leg. He leaned in right next to my ear to whisper something I couldn't quite catch over me panicking while the others just laughed. Suddenly his other hand went around my breasts under my shirt. And the other one who spoke before touched his freaking dick over his pants.
After a few seconds of pure shock I managed to stand up, pushed past and loudly told them to fuck off and leave me alone. Even then they tried to block my way and wouldn't let me walk away easily.
The worst part? The other people in the carriage just watched. No one intervened. No one helped. Unfortunately, this isn't new to me either most of the time people in this city just look away. I was so uncomfortable but wa able to squeeze past them while stepping on that one guys toes and I went out to take an other ubahn.
I finally made it home and told my boyfriend what happened, looking for comfort. Instead he completely turned on me. He said that I should stop lying. Something always happens to me and that I should just be honest and admit that Im an attention-seeking slut. And that Im a cheater for letting them touch me.
I am completely heartbroken and numb. I’ve learned to be extremely cautious and aware of my environment over the years but sometimes you just can't prevent it.
I wanted to ask the community, especially the women (but guys too)
Do you experience this kind of harassment on a weekly basis here too?
Does anyone ever actually step in to help you or is the lack of civil courage always this bad for you all too?
Edit: I can understand why people don't step in because it can end dangerous for them too. But I always think, if it's not only one but multiple people that could step in then it's not as dangerous anymore for anyone. It's just frustrating and scary at these moments to feel alone when you know people could help
Thanks for reading. Please stay safe out there