I’m at the breaking point with my husband
I guess I’ll jump right in because I need another opinion. I’ve been carrying all of the mental , physical and spiritual load for our 4 kids under 6. My mom just died half a year ago. She was a huge help and I’ve been grieving. My husband works and provided financially. I stay at home. And I do everything else. I had to hound him to get the dog help because he’s been sick for over a year throwing up. I’ve been taking him to the vet. I’ve been switching dog food and cleaning up vomit on the carpet. It’s disgusting. After a year of telling him and no change I went to a hotel with the kids until he found a solution for the dog. I feel like he pushes me to my absolute limits.
Since my mom’s passing I get little help with my kids. My grandma helps but she can’t watch all 4 at once. Grandpa has altheimerz. It’s a bad situation. I’m always with at least 1 of my kids. Most of the time 2 when the older 2 are at school. I breastfeed, clean constantly, do school events. My husband goes hunting with his friends on the weekends, store with his friend, boxing matches. It seems he always does whatever he wants and has no regard for the absolute tremendous amount I’m doing.
Well tonight he was bothering me because I’m in a bad mood. I’ve been taking care of the kids. He’s been asleep. I took the kids to church, alone this morning. I’m EXHAUSTED. He said he doesn’t want to go on vacation with me this week because I’m in a bad mood (he knows what’s been bothering me). So I went upstairs to get some space. He says we are basically like roommates. And I wouldn’t have anything if it weren’t for him. He complains about our sex life. Me and the kids have been sick for 3 weeks. My mom just died. The kids don’t sleep until late and I’m just tired and he doesn’t help me.
He said he’s never going to change he is how he is and if I don’t like it I can get a divorce. At this point I would. It would force him to father the kids. And do everything I’ve been doing alone, half of the time. He would be forced to clean his own stuff and clean up after the kids. He has no clue just how much I’m doing. I don’t want a divorce because I know it’s wrong, and the kids would be so upset. But I’m so miserable and he’s told me he’s not going to change.