I have prayed so many times for things that I need and for my life to improve, and instead, I am noticing that the very things that I pray over are disappearing and slipping through my fingers. Like once I pray for something to stay around or for things to go well with them, they just end or disappear now. How do you even process this? I have had times where I prayed and absolutely nothing changed. I want to believe that God has something better in store for me, but why does that come after a long and miserable trial of failure and loss? I am just confused by this.
I know that everyone struggles in life, regardless of their religion, religious beliefs, or practices. But if God loves us, why do we suddenly go through devastating periods, even if we had been consistent in your faith and prayer? I have a bunch of mixed thoughts, so I apologize. I am just trying to get some type of clarity. I have seen what God can do and how he has worked in my life. But right now I am going through the lowest and hardest point of my life that I've ever experienced and now I am losing the small things that feel like hopeful opportunities or signs for the future. I don't know how to deal with that or what to think of it.
My main questions are the following. Why would I be losing things that I am actively praying to keep and build upon? Why have years gone by with nothing but loss and stagnancy, even when it completely broke me mentally, emotionally, and spiritually? How am I supposed to operate as I am constantly praying but having my mind and faith destroyed by my day-to-day experiences?