This is a long one so strap in.
My best friend of 13 years (we‘re going to call her Brittney) decided to throw me a birthday party for my 26th birthday. She told me that she would take care of everything. Mind you she had over a month to plan the party ( my birthday is in July).
On The day of my birthday, I was told to stay out of my house until 2 pm so that everything can set up and people to show up. By the time I got home, nobody was at my house. She was running late and only told my roommate and that only because he asked her. She so late that the only other guest to come to the party to there before her. By the time she gets to my house. She tells me to wait in my room so that her, her husband, and my friends (my roommate and guest) to set the party up.
I waited in my room for about 2 hours for them to set everything up. i had enough time to take a nap and for one of my friends to sneak me a bag of chips since I was starving. during this time my roommate is giving updates on what’s happening, and they weren’t good. Brittney apparently forgot some decor and other things and had my roommate and my other friends go out and get it. These things included plates, food, and streamers. Your usual things that you need for a party that she didn’t get for some reason. It also turned out that Brittney asked my other friends a week prior to come to party, which couldn’t because they had work. Hell even our shared bestie didn’t know about the party until the day of.
When I’m finally able to come downstairs, what i saw was insane. Brittney and gang spent 2 hours setting up like 3 party streamers, a small backdrop for pictures, and mood lights. There was paper cut outs of Y2K slogans on sticks and a couple balloons along with burgers and hotdogs. i thought to myself there’s no way this took 2 hours but I still smiled and said everything looked great. Atp I was just ready to eat and drink, only to bite into a burger and it was still raw…all of the burgers were still raw. after this I was officially over everything but still smiled and kept entertaining this “party” after taking some pics and cutting the cake, everyone left and left me and my roommate to clean the kitchen and left over decor.
Out of frustration, I sent brittney a text explaining how the party she threw made me feel like an after thought. I talked about how she‘s always late to friend events along with other older things that she’s done throughout our friendship. I wont lie the text was nasty and I definitely should of went about it better and I definitely shouldn’t have brought the old stuff but it all just came out like a flood of emotion. i was just extremely hurt and frustrated that my best friend of 13 years would treat me like, especially since this was technically my first ever birthday party.
The text really hurt her. To the point where she distanced herself from not only me but our gc too. We eventually talked and I agreed to communicate better, she didn’t really agree to do anything different. In fact she justified her being by saying sometimes it takes a lot for her to get up and I completely understand that but never communicate that you some time to yourself or something happened and you’re going to be late. After this things are awkward. I made attempts to reach out only to get small talk. In October 2025, I saw that she posted on insta that she had a dance recital and invited some friends. I texted her asking if it was to late to see her perform again. She luckily had another performance that I could go to so I went. That night went extremely well. we talked and laughed like old times, made future plans to hangout more, and she even told that she really appreciated me come out and that she need it. Here, I‘m thinking after this that were on our way to build a better and stronger friendship.
After the recital things go back to silence. In February 2026, I went to her house to hangout and things felt off. I found out during this that she was hanging out with our other best friend without me. We go back to silence. fast forward to late April 2026 and i fund out through other people that she’s still mad about the text and she completely stops responding to my messages and calls. Like Wtf? Why not bring it up to me and why still talk/hangout if you already know you don’t want to be friends. This whole situation is weird and it feels like I'm being gaslight into thinking we weren’t friends anymore or at the very least working towards it. but then again, i was the only trying and put in effort. Like how can you just cut off a friendship without a single word?