should i marry this guy? pls help!!
I (23F) have been with a guy (25M, let's call him M) for 5 years. We met in medschool and get along really well, have been in the same friend group since and genuinely love each other very much.
M is an average-ish good-looking guy. What made me fall for him was his personality, calmness and patience (God knows how many buttons I push of this man daily yet he never reacted harshly) and how we understood each other and were always on the same page regarding everything uptill now.
A little backstory: I was born and brought up in Saudi Arabia and moved here for further studies. I plan to move abroad after giving international exams as doctors in Pak aren't valued financially for the effort they put in here (in my opinion). My parents have supported my every need and wish financially, Alhamdulillah, and I'm very grateful to them for that.
M, on the other hand, has lived here all his life and has said he plans to move abroad too, but has to work for it financially all on his own while supporting his fam too. His parents are divorced and father has remarried and doesn't live in the country. His family is living pretty much hand-to-mouth at the moment.
I have asked him about his plans regarding marrying me, and our circumstances. He's mentioned I'll have to stay with my in-laws (something I'm very against due to lack of privacy and have mentioned that again and again) for the first few years while he builds the wealth to afford international exams for himself, as living separate is too expensive. For financial plans, he mentioned him, his dad and his younger brother (who lives abroad) will support the house, while my income will go into investing for both of our futures and won't be touched (which kind of saddens me as I've worked so hard to study and be where I am, only to not enjoy the end results), but he mentions jo chahie usse bataun wo meri wishes poori karega and not to touch my money as that's purely for our growth.
I've loved him deeply for 5 years and don't know what to do at this point. When I mention my concerns, he tells me marrying for love has consequences, and it is what it is, but does hope we'll grow together and reach where we want to be, but have to struggle for a few years at the start.
Whenever we go in loops regarding my concerns, he tells me annoyingly to just go for arranged marriage, as all I want is a rich well-settled man with everything inherited by his parents and an abroad passport.. even though I never demanded anything extreme from him..
My question is: is love marriage enough to marry despite the number of differences and the compromises? I love him too much but it hurts that the baggage he carries might affect me. Will it? Can married girls of PakReddit please help?
JazakAllah.