AIO BF still insists to be in contact with his ex and still going to her house on weekly basis
I have been with my bf for 7 months. Overall we are very compatible, happy couples and we blended each other life well.
Before we started our RS, bf confessed that he was still remain friend with his ex and he has the duty (that in his words) to take care of their pets after they broke off. He wished that I do not make this an issue as he is really seriously in loved with me and claimed that they are platonic. And I requested that he has to be transparent with me on everything regarding them and inform me when he goes to his ex house. And he also promised that this will subsequently fade off and reduced over time.
In between that, we always have arguments about this because I found out the dynamics and connections do not seemed to be platonic. Cause the ex, let’s call her IL, is very disrespectful and she keeps wanting to reconcile with my bf. She will write publicly how she cannot love anyone anymore except my bf, keep tagging him in social media stories and even will ask him to celebrate her birthday with her. And due to her keep stalking bout me, I came across her social media profile and found out that all along my bf has been ‘with her’ (publicly) until he is with me (he claimed that he has broken off with her near to a year before being with me). That because it can be seen in public post of IL that they spent all the important dates (example valentines, birthdays etc) together and can see that he was still overnight at her house. She even posted a lot of recent photos of them together and my bf did like the posts of hers
To cut story short, after I voiced out that I have issue with him celebrating her birthday cause it does seem that he couldn’t get over her or at least he was letting her having easy access on him romantically. Even worse still, if he has free time in between his jobs, he once told me he would rest there. I made a scene about that and subsequently it does feel like he doesn’t go there anymore to rest. However, ever since this incident, he refused to talk bout everything regarding them (he chose to hid when he goes there, yes he still go there on weekly basis and I know that).
I personally do not think my bf is cheated on me (he really has done a lot or at least show a lot to be in my life and committed to be with me) but I do feel he is quite adamant when comes to having autonomous about this connection of his and his ex. He said he never go to the ex house when she was around and he purely going there to take care of the pets for real quick. I know he wasn’t lying and it’s true but I am saddened with the facts that why he can’t see that this is hurting me and why is it fair to me to silent myself? I do not want to lose myself or losing him, I wish to know if I am over reacting and any advice if I should let go this Rs even though we are so much in love?