Abusive Relationship Vent
TW ⚠️
Ngl I don’t even know where to start. this was my first everything, I met him when I was 13, we got together when I was 15 and were together for the rest of our high school year. I had just gotten out of a relationship, constant throwing up and super depressed and my old hb came over, we drank like teens do and he was a couple years older than me so he knew more people to get what he needed.
The first night was my BIGGEST red flag, I told him I didn’t wanna do anything until he took me out (since I was fresh out of a relationship) I blacked out and threw up on him, he took me to the bathroom to clean up and we showered but didn’t do anything and after we were fully clothed and laying down he left hickeys on my neck, I cut him off because I was insanely uncomfortable and wasn’t ready for intimacy, I just knew him for a long period (also mind you I just got out a relationship with a female so I wasn’t think anything sexual and was blacking out. I’m lot more aware of my surroundings now)
months pass and we constantly see each other because of the friend group, he talks to me and completely trauma dumps and I got to know him for things he’s been through and met his family, things start getting better he pulls out the ‘I’ll change, I was drunk.’ But then it happened again, and again and eventually I told him ‘if you do this one more time I’m cutting you off for good.’ A couple weeks later he was touching me in my sleep trying to do things and just overall crossing my spoken boundaries, I told him to stop and moved his hand a couple times.
I get up, pack my shit and walk home. He eventually shows up, keeps contacting me and we’re on and off. I told him I didn’t wanna hook up until I had gotten on birth control and he asked me to get on it before his 18th birthday. Do you even understand what that does to a person?
I was naive, a couple months later were drinking and people saying I should just do it, so I did it. The. Worst. Decision. I. Ever. Made.
We started getting into physical fights, breaking up and finding out he was talking to other girls, I was talking to other people but the difference was I told him everything I mean EVERYTHING about it and he was lying to my face, I went through his messages, seen he was texting some bitch, threw his phone at his face and ever since then he was just someone I hooked up with, I didn’t know what to do, I was attached but eventually I completely cut him off, it was the hardest thing to do, I ran to him when I got 🍇, And he came to the hospital in less than 10 minutes. I bought him food, helped him get a place to stay and put up with SOOO much disrespect. and then he sent me this, after his new gf texted me trying to fight and telling me to take down the pictures of him that we aren’t even doing anything tg in. Mind you we’re all wayy too grown to be talking like this. I’m trying to keep it in the past but it really is just my fault at the end of the day. don’t stay with someone disrespectful because you think they love you, that was NOT love I was just naive. now it’s been 7 months, I get this and I don’t know how to even feel anymore.