Not sure what to do
Hello everyone, not sure what to do or where to turn but I’m lost. I’m the caretaker for my ex wife’s grandmother, long story there but I’ve been the caretaker for her and my grandfather. He passed in 2023 so it’s just been her. I think I’ve been kidding myself about her condition for awhile, she’s been seeing shadows of people and bugs on the wall but refused to get an mri. Eye doctor said he has severe cataracts, so figured we would go down that rabbit hole to see if it helped. Never once clicked in my mind that she would have dementia or the beginning stages (absolutely think I’ve been kidding myself there.) Didn’t get the surgery though because we were waiting on some heart test results. Once this happened I got her a nurse to come in twice a week to help her on the days I can’t be there due to work. Last Sunday after visiting with her at around 600pm she had a fall and was on the floor for about 12-14 hours before my wife found her. I have cameras in the house to watch her but she fell in the one spot I don’t have them. We got her to the hospital and she had a minor stroke and UTI. They treated her during that time but she started getting very aggressive with the nurses hitting and yelling. Accusing them of going in her purse which I have secured at my house and not remembering her name or general details. She was move to transitional care today and when I went to see her after she got their. she yelled at me telling her that I put her in her, how I showed my true colors after all these years and just being very mean and hateful. I know it’s not her but it’s hard not to see her, she is like my mom I’ve known her 20 years and she made me the man I am today. I can’t take it to heart but god damnit I am 100% taking it to heart. Had a bit of a breakdown driving home after seeing her tonight they said she could be sun downing but to give her time to get better. I’m faced with a decision now to consider putting her in memory care knowing that it’s the safest option but risking her hating my guts till the end. Idk if i’m asking for help or maybe venting, she can’t be at her own home by herself and I don’t have room for her at my house with my kids and everything. I just feel like a giant piece of crap right now so i’m sorry for the long and confusing story and allowing me to out this in words somewhere.