I told a guy who has protected and defended me that he looked tired and expressed concern, the next day he was performatively cheerful and didn't spend time with me
For some context: I am giving a quick summary - the background may be slightly different from the other posts on this forum. Due to some circumstances a guy I like and who I know really likes me cannot at present make moves towards each other though we could in the future. We are Indians, he is a very honorable man with a slightly old fashioned makeup, I feel he has very little practical experience with romance and only knows about marriage, I don't think he even fully understands what to do when dating. We are not at present in circumstances where we can hang out in private and date (we will be in some time) but I know he cares about me.
He had recently defended me and taken a lot of trouble over me, I was facing some bullying etc which was very subtle and wasn't flaggable, he did a lot behind the scenes to make sure I wasn't troubled any longer. He was getting consistently jabbed at because of his defense of me but took it all on like it was his responsibility. He's an oddly old fashioned man, a little shy, he only peeks at me occasionally, has treated me with a lot of courtesy, makes sure he's very gentlemanly around me, has literally gotten a chaperone sometimes though I know he was crazily excited to be around me (part of this is to protect my reputation in the somewhat odd circumstances we are in which prevent us from getting too close, but these will change with some time). Essentially he managed it so that people no longer bully me but occasionally jab at him (he has to remain on apparent good terms with them due to some reasons, it's a tricky line he's toeing, he has to socialize with them etc. He's a very clever man who I've seen play a lot of games to defend me.). I'm still not completely sure how. He is a barely communicative man and I feel embarassed about reaching out too much. I know he wants to marry me, he's a silent man who should have been born a century earlier.
The other day I felt he looked very tired and drained as he kept volleying off stuff directed at me. I felt so guilty and sad (before this he always seemed capable and able to handle it but that specific day he just looked so tired). I reached out to him on chat and decided to be frank and said I was worried defending me was costing him his peace of mind, and saying that while I appreciated everything he had done for me I didn't want it to drain him, that I wanted to be a source of happiness than otherwise. He's a man who I always felt needed care, I couldn't go on without atleast letting him know I was worried. He replied and told me I had never caused him and do not cause him stress in any way.
The next day (the day after that he would be away with some others for a few days, so inside I was pre-emptively missing him) he was overtly bright, cheerful and active. He talked to everyone, invited the others he'd be going away with for more things (like a run etc which I wouldn't participate in). It was like he was purposely leaving me out, even my friend wondered if I'd feel left out.
I felt terrible and insecure and jealous because I barely get any time to spend with him and here he was planning social stuff with others in that little time before he was leaving, he was deliberately not paying me attention like he usually does. At the end I got cross and walked away crossly, he tried to follow me a little (couldn't do it too overtly) but I immediately changed direction angrily and hid in the washroom. He had to be away for a couple of things and I kept disappearing to the washroom around the times he'd be back so he didn't get a chance to interact with me.
Later on I reached out over text to wish him a good trip and he seemed so relieved. (I didn't know at that time but he had spent some time right before that trying to make my life easier in some ways and fix some stuff for me.)
I am younger than him (not that much, but his personality is much older than his age, while I am in my early twenties but behave like a kid sometimes i.e I have ADHD etc), and I know in the past he's worried about not seeming young and cool enough for me, but I don't know.
I am mainly asking this because I don't always understand male psychology especially with all the "alpha male" stuff inundating the culture. But I know he cares for me, and so I feel hurt about his ignoring me a little.
To clarify I too often ignore him due to the circumstances, but this felt pointed because he planned social stuff with others and I felt sad because he would be leaving for some days.
I'm sorry I'm not giving enough details, I'm not in anything shady or dangerous, I was just trying to strike a balance between giving out too much and too little info in this question because otherwise I may have to explain a loooooot and may have done the latter. I know there's a cultural barrier in understanding my situation but actually I'm a very modern young woman, he's the one who feels like a different generation. He loves me and is not misogynistic (he is always happy and admiring to see my strong side), just unused to some stuff and following old fashioned scripts I guess.