F16 My unfortunate life
This feels like the only place I can possibly vent. I feel alone and scared. I am so grateful for my relatives who are helping me, but I can’t talk to them about this.
I was exposed to sex young. Whether it was porn or literally seeing my mom and step dad having sex, it was always something I was exposed to.
I had my first bf when I was 12 and he was 14, ended terribly he used me, which I find crazy that a 14 year old can do that. I dated again when I was 13, I was with a 16 year old boy who really fucked me up. He was cheated on me multiple times and treated me like shit. It got to the point where he wouldn’t even hide that he was cheating and thankfully he dumped me because I didn’t have the heart too.
Unfortunately my step dad was the only person I could talk to because my mom was so against me dating I was scared to tell her. Well he used that against me and ended up using me sexually. I let him because I was also in a dark place and I liked him.
When it got exposed what happened my mom blamed me. She also blamed my step dad. She divorced him and moved me away to live with cousins because I was past forgiveness. Haven’t seen her since.
I’ve been living with her trauma for years now and I simply don’t know what to do.