Now he is transfemine after 8 years of marriage
Me 31F my husband 39M.
Almost 8 year of marriage.
N 5 year of marriage without sex.
In beginning i thought it's me getting fat and ugly also unattractive after my my delivery.
After baby, he never touched me or try to come closer to me.
I started trying it with weight loss then trying sexy lingerie and naughty chats but nothing worked.
We started living more like a flatmate than partner and sleep in different room.
Few time I checked and got him doing sexting and masturbate.
The weird thing was he pretend to being a girl and do sexting with guys.
I tried to figure out why.
Then spoke to gay, trans, queer, bisexual and also few intersex people.
All of them denied he didn't belong to their community he has some mental disorder.
I took an appointment with psychologist and psychiatrist also. Both of them said he has split personality and now the other personality is overtaking the other one (which one is his real identity)
We had a arrange + love marriage.
I was in Live-in for 5months.
N he used to do all these things before marriage.
But I never ever caught him doing this.
He was sexually also active although i never felt like he is into me from his touch. It's always felt like sex more than being loved.
Now he is transfemine.
Not giving divorce to me.
Also I feel bond to marriage and not able to have anything outside the marriage.
My stupid inner soul doesn't allow me this. We have 4.5yr old baby girl.
My family is not supportive they are like get divorced and live alone.
But I want to start my new life for god sake I'm just 31.
I want to feel loved and experience how healthy marriage looks like..
The couple life.
I don't understand what to do.
He is a father of my daughter.
I can't even expose him.
But I'm getting detached from every single thing.
I started feeling I will go mad or will kill someone with this anger.
I crave for sex but can't do it bcz somewhere in my mind I'm a wife of someone.
I tried sex toys and survived all these years but now I want things in real and my husband is in own world.
I tried talking, counseling, being understanding for thing he is facing, tried to fulfill his fantasies but with everything i end up with the reality he doesn't love me. He is not into me.
He shows interest in cuckold things but being honest I feel like shut and the thought of doing that is scary for me.
If anyone faced the similar situation pls help me how u all dealed with this..
Living like this is so suffocating.