I'm a horrible person
I miss my friends. I've made a few actually good friends that I've opened up to seriously. I feel like I didn't have to pretend to be someone I wasn't, they were some people I really cared about. Now I sit her loathing because I fucking miss them so god damn much. I've lost contact with them with no way to talk to them in any medium or measure and all I can think about is how I didn't cherish our moments together well enough. These people were some of the best people on the planet, they helped me when I was especially suicidal and all I did in return was be an angsty shit. All I ever do is hurt the people I care about. I wish I was better but I'm not. I want to stop hurting others, I want to be able to be someone who is the one there for others rather then the one who constantly needs help instead. I don't know what to do but I'm afraid I'll find a way to hurt the few friends I do have left. Everywhere I go I bring hurt and misery to all, I just want it to stop.