My Wife gave birth to a beautiful baby girl last week. Unfortunately, it was done via C-Section. Wife was progressing through labor but stopped dilating at 7cm after ~48 hours of misoprostil/pitocin induced labor. Doctor came in and said they needed to do a C-Section. I did my best to be strong for my Wife, but the surgery experience was very traumatic mentally for me. My Wife had the hardest part of going into surgery and having to be heavily sedated, and it was absolutely heartbreaking.
Fast-forward 6 days. We are all at home now, baby is doing fine, Wife is recovering. I am doing my best to handle everything that I can (helping Wife get dressed, helping Wife in/out of bed, waking up every 3 hours to feed baby overnight, handling bottle feeding while Wife breastpumps) and I am very overwhelmed. We went to the Pediatrician on Monday and found that our baby had lost ~12% of her birth weight post-birth. Implemented a very regimented feeding schedule, every 3 hours no exceptions. Went back to the Pediatrician on Tuesday and found that our baby had gained ~2oz of weight back, so that made me so happy that I burst out in tears in the doctor's office.
I never cry. Maybe once a year. Since my daughter got here, I have been crying nearly every day, multiple times per day, and when I am not crying I feel like crying still. I feel the weight of the world on my shoulders and am feeling literally every emotion every day (happiness, sadness, frustration, despair, hope). I haven't been eating well because my stomach has been in knots since my Wife had to have her surgery. I am doing my best, but it doesn't feel like it's enough. My Sister has been helping out here and there with laundry, cleaning, baby care, dog care, but she can't be here all the time and I don't have any friends/family nearby other than her to come help out.
I am struggling with feeling like myself. Wife is too. We are navigating this the best we can, but I can't shake the overwhelming existential feelings that I have been having, to the point where I can't relax and enjoy anything. If anyone has any advice on how to feel more positive and less stressed/depressed, please let me know! :) Thank you for listening!
Edit: I forgot to mention another thing I am dealing with. I am having a lot of anxiety surrounding feeding baby due to the weight loss thing. We are on a feeding plan, but sometimes baby doesn't like to finish her bottle, and my brain starts going straight to worst-case scenario which causes more anxiety.