Me and my cousin Bea have always been close, or I thought we were. I'm finishing my master's degree this spring, first in my family to do it, big deal for everyone.
I told Bea my graduation date back in October. She said she was so proud of me and that she'd be there. We talked about it more than once. I even sent her the official university confirmation when it came through so she had it in writing.
In January she announced her wedding date. Same weekend. Same Saturday actually.
When I pointed this out she said she'd already put the deposit down and that venues are hard to book and she didn't think I'd mind since "graduation ceremonies are long and boring anyway." I was pretty hurt by that but I tried to stay calm. I asked if there was any flexibility and she said no.
My mom thinks I should just go to the wedding and celebrate graduation separately with family another time. My dad thinks Bea did this on purpose because she's always needed to be the center of attention at family events, which I don't know if I fully believe but I understand why he thinks it.
I told Bea I wouldn't be at the wedding. She cried. Her mom called me selfish. My mom is now in the middle and stressed about the whole thing.
Here's my honest feeling. I told her the date. She booked over it. I'm not skipping my own graduation, the one thing I've worked toward for two years, because the timing is inconvenient for her planning. But I also know how this looks to the rest of the family and I genuinely don't know if I'm being unreasonable or not.
Am I wrong?