r/amiwrong

Recently, i (15f) was minding my own business preparing my breakfast. Then my mom out of nowhere tells me to stop wearing those 'slutty clothes'. I was wearing a crop top and gym shorts (about 2-3 inches). I asked why she has a problem with my clothes but she called me a slut and told me to stop wearing revealing clothes. She also commented that my butt has grown bigger since i was a kid, which made me feel weirded out. I told her she was making me feel uncomfortable but she said i needed a reality check. She has slut shamed me many times before but i felt more uncomfortable this time.

Is this my fault here? I don't really get how my clothes are that divisive.

I need outside perspective because I genuinely don’t know if I’m overreacting anymore.

For context: my sister has had a long-standing habit of sleeping in my room and using my stuff/space as 8 was staying with my long time boyfriend for a while. Weeks ago, I explicitly told her I was no longer okay with it and asked her to stop sleeping in my room since it was always a wreck whenever I came home. This wasn’t vague. It was a direct boundary.

Fast forward to sunday.

I come home, go to walk into my room, and there is a completely naked man I have NEVER met before in my bed.

To make it worse, both of them currently have two untreated STIs, (not my circus not my monkeys) which made the whole situation feel even more violating and disgusting to me knowing they were in my bed and around my personal space.

I’m not even really mad at the guy because I genuinely think she probably told him it was her room or acted like it was normal. The issue is that it was MY room, MY bed, and I had already told her weeks ago to stop using my room entirely.

She never actually apologized either. Instead, she basically just gave an excuse about how they moved into my room because of the fans after she got sick. That honestly made it feel worse, because it didn’t acknowledge the actual issue at all. It felt less like accountability and more like she was trying to justify ignoring my boundary.

What’s making me lose it isn’t even just this one event. It’s the constant pattern:

• sleeping in my room after being told not to,
• leaving her things in there,
• using my TV/accounts,
• treating my room like shared space,
• and me constantly being expected to be the understanding/flexible one.

Even after this happened, I was finding random evidence of people using my room/accounts and it just made me realize how little privacy I actually have.

I didn’t scream or throw her stuff outside or anything. I calmly told my dad what happened, told him I planned to install a lock on my room, and specifically asked him not to make it a huge family fight yet because I wanted to handle it privately.

Right now I’ve:

• stripped and washed all my bedding,
• removed her belongings from my room,
• and decided my room will stay locked whenever I’m not home.
• installing a camera for my door.

Part of me feels guilty because I know it’ll inconvenience her if she wants something from my room while I’m gone, but another part of me is exhausted from constantly being the one inconvenienced so everyone else can stay comfortable.

This honestly feels like the straw that broke the camel’s back after years of one-sided respect and family boundary issues.

Am I overreacting by locking my room and emotionally distancing myself at this point?

Additional Info: The guy is my sister’s situationship, its messy but one of her friends popped for 2 different STI’s and was with him while he and my sister were on a break and my sister found this out after already being back with him. Sorry for not elaborating more on that didn’t think to in original post but can see how it reads weird without that info now!

ALSO: I pay rent monthly to go towards the mortgage so it is my room, whether I’m there 1 time a month or 7 days a week.

I married my wife in my twenties and i loved her and thought wed build something even, but it never really worked out that way. early on her parents needed help and ended up moving in with us, and i agreed because i thought it was the decent thing to do, but it slowly turned the house into her and her parents on one side and me on the other.

every decision got overruled three to one. holidays were always done their way, my own family got treated as an afterthought and i ended up going to their things alone because she never wanted to come. i couldnt even have a quiet say in my own home without the three of them closing ranks. i raised it constantly, i suggested counselling more times than i can count, i told her plainly for years that i felt like a lodger in my own marriage.

what kept me there was that my mum had been unwell for a long time and she lived nearby and i was the one who looked after her, and i couldnt face blowing up the family while i was also caring for her. when she passed away last autumn something just lifted and settled at the same time, and within about two weeks i filed for divorce. we had next to nothing in the way of assets so it was clean.

my wife says i blindsided her and had no idea i was unhappy, and i asked her what she thought fourteen years of the same argument was about, or all those times id begged for counselling. now im in my early forties starting over, i took a better job ive turned down for years because it meant evenings away, i moved to a new place, ive got a rescue dog and ive actually made friends again.

her family and her say im the bad guy for waiting until my mum was gone and then walking out instead of "talking to her about it." i talked to her about all of it for over a decade. am i wrong for leaving the moment i finally could?

I (28m) started a small business seven years ago with my best mate from school. we built it together from nothing and i trusted him completely, right up until i found out hed slowly been moving things into his own name and cutting side deals behind my back, and by the time i pieced it all together id basically been squeezed out of the company id helped build. it wasnt one thing, it had been going on for years.

the part that actually broke me was my family. my mate had always been close with them, hed come to every christmas and sunday lunch for years and my parents treated him like another son, and his own family situation was rough so he leaned into mine hard. when it all came out i assumed my lot would close ranks around me and drop him.

six weeks later i found out my mum and my sister were still texting him every day, checking in on him, and then he was back round my parents for dinner like nothing had happened. i sat them down and said i was hurt theyd stand by him after what he did to me, and they told me they couldnt just cut him off because hed been part of the family too long and he was struggling. i said straight out they couldnt have both of us, and they kept him anyway.

i stopped showing up to family things and eventually i blocked the lot of them. before i did i went and grabbed the bits of mine still at my parents place, and when they called me a child throwing a tantrum and said i was just trying to hurt them, i told them it was never about hurting them, it was about them having zero consideration for me, and then i congratulated them on losing me and keeping him and said it was nice to know where i ranked.

am i wrong for the congratulations comment and for cutting them off over this?

So me (M20) and my girlfriend (F19) recently moved into her moms (F39) house, it was her moms idea. We all agreed that I would send her mom the money for rent, and she would send it to the landlord until it was in our name, and in return we would keep all her stuff until they found another house.

But a few months before we moved in, her mom was rushing us to get the money and move in faster. Once we finally got the money and were all packed up, we told her we were ready and so was she.

June 1st is the date we agreed to move, once we got there and started bringing all of our stuff, they put everything of theirs into one bedroom, which I found kind of odd because there was only one bedroom but there was a garage they could’ve put them in. After they left and I sent her the money, we started unpacking our stuff and slept in the living room.

A week or two pass and the landlord stops by saying she hasn’t received the rent money for this month, we we’re confused because I sent the exact amount for rent, and half of rent for damage deposit. I showed the landlord that I sent the money and she was confused because she hasn’t gotten it.

We then put two and two together and found out she took my money for herself. We had 4 days to come up with $1200, but we sent every dollar we had to her mom. But you can’t really blame us for trusting her, we had no reason to not trust her about this because she hasn’t done anything to make us not trust her.

We messaged her mom asking about that money, and saying we need it back for rent. She was saying how she needs the last half of the damage deposit before she can send the money, but like I said we already sent one months worth of rent to her and half of dd which even the landlord said one months rent is only what she needs.

She then started going off about how my girlfriend always asked family for money when she was younger and hasn’t paid them back. And my girlfriend was trying to explain to her that it was my money that she took not my girlfriends, but her mom said “don't mean shit fuck ur a couple remember that's how shit goes. Get a job n pay back those people or don't message me about paying (me) back cause that's how many other peoples like I said my friends and families.” I don’t think she remembers the actual reason we sent the money. Then she started saying how ONE TIME she bought my brother munchies and we owed her back because “I didn’t have to buy him munchies” but we didn’t even ask her too, she offered.

We ended up getting enough the next day, with help from my family after we explained what happened. We told her mom that if we don’t get the money back we are going to sell her stuff so we can make back the amount I gave to her for rent. She then started saying “go ahead sell my shit cause with the receipts and prices I paid you’d be paying me back cause you’d be charged for selling over even”. We weren’t going to sell her stuff, because we didn’t want to be like that towards her, it was us trying to get our money back. We also told her she isn’t getting her stuff back until she pays us back the money.

It’s been almost a year since all that has happened, and she still hasn’t gave back my money, and we still have her stuff in the garage. Her mom has been using her siblings against her, saying “you can’t see them till you breakup with (me)” and “they don’t want to see you because of the stuff you pulled”.

It’s been almost a year since my girlfriend has seen her siblings, and her mom is still blaming us for it. Her mom also turned majority of her family against us, but we’re slowly getting in contact with them and letting them know the actual truth. We found out that her mom claimed we kicked her out of the house and stole their stuff. But once we showed the messages she was sending and the proof of me sending the money, they started to actually believe us.

Do we just give up on waiting for the money and sell her things?

So,I (27F) have a friend I’ve known for years. A few months ago she went through a rough breakup and recently asked if she could stay with me temporarily while she figured things out. At first I was open to it because we’ve always been close. But before this, she did something that honestly changed how I see her.... She admitted that she once had one of her friends text my boyfriend from a fake account just to “see if he’d cheat” and also to see whether I’d tell her about it. Apparently it was some kind of loyalty test because she thinks “you never really know people.”
My boyfriend ignored the messages, but I was bothered she’d even do something like that behind my back. When I confronted her, she laughed it off and said I was overreacting because “nothing actually happened.” Since then I’ve kept my distance. So when she asked to stay with me, I told her I wasn’t comfortable having someone in my home who plays mind games like that. Now some mutual friends are saying I’m being cold and punishing her over “one mistake” when she’s already struggling. I do feel bad because she genuinely needs help right now, but I also feel like trust matters, especially if someone’s going to be living in your space.
Am I wrong?

Im 31m and my sister is 27. Our mum is 68 and not in great health, shes mobile but shes forgetful and needs a fair bit of looking after, and since i work from home my sister decided that basically makes me the default carer for her.

It started small. "Hey can you have mum for an hour while i pop to the shops." Then it turned into "can she stay with you this afternoon while i get my hair done." Then it became "theres this weekend away with the girls, can you have mum." And i said yes a lot, because i love my mum and honestly it felt harder to say no than to just deal with it.

One saturday she dropped mum off at 9am, text me "luv u!!!", and didnt come back until gone midnight, drunk. Id had nothing prepped, none of mums proper medication with me, nothing, just a half empty pill organiser she left on my counter.

I told her more than once that im not set up for this. I dont resent mum at all, thats half the problem, i always made it work, got her fed, sorted her tablets, settled. I think my sister saw that and decided i could just keep making it work forever.

About two weeks ago i had a massive work presentation in the morning. I told her the night before i couldnt help the next day, reminded her again that morning, i was already stressed trying to get ready. Around 6am she rang crying saying she had something on and only needed a couple of hours. I said no. Not maybe, just no.

She came anyway. Left mum sat on my porch, knocked, and drove off before i even got to the door. So i had mum outside confused and no real option but to bring her in. I missed the presentation, my boss tore into me, and i got pulled off a project id worked on for months.

That night i took mum back and told my sister if she ever did that again id be ringing social services. She just gave me this disappointed look and said "fine, ill sort it myself like always," so i was too tired to argue and i left.

Then i changed my locks because she had a spare key.

Next day she turned up with mum again the key didnt work, and she scratched her key right down my front door before leaving. My neighbour text me asking if she should call the police. My sisters now ghosting me everywhere and im just completely burnt out. AIW?

My stepsister Madison and I used to be friends before my mom married her mom. Once they moved in I started to find being around her really annoying and I don't like to anymore. I feel like I see her too much and I just want some space from her because I don't get that there since we share a room and because I see her a lot at school. I used to invite Madison and other friends over to my dads house because he's not usually there and everyone likes it there the most, but I don't invite her anymore because I just want that place to be where I get a break from her. Now she's always bothering me about me not inviting her over when I have our friends over so she feels like she doesn't get to hang out with them outside of school anymore. She can though because she can invite them over or to do something, but she says they never will since I'm asking them to come over to my dads. Its not like I'm making them though. They can do whatever they want.

I am sitting here wondering if I am actually the insane one or if my mother has finally lost her last marble. For context I am twenty-eight and work in QA which means I have zero patience for things that do not function correctly. I have been single for about a year since my last relationship ended in a boring way and I have been enjoying the peace. My mom however treats my lack of a boyfriend like a personal failure on her part. She has been sending me links to articles about biological clocks and loneliness in old age for months. I ignored it because that is just how she is.

Last Tuesday I was getting coffee and this guy walks up to me with a huge grin and asks if I liked the book he suggested. I have never seen this man in my life. He starts talking about some obscure poet and how we agreed to meet up there at 10 AM. I basically had to tell him he had the wrong person but he showed me his phone. It was my face. The profile name was mine and the bio was some weird fan fiction version of my life where I love hiking and baking bread. I do neither of those things. I spent the next hour figuring out that my mom had used my old iPad that I left at her house to set up a Tinder account using my Instagram photos.

She did not even try to hide it when I called her. She told me she was pre-screening candidates because I am too picky and do not know what I want. Apparently she has been talking to over a dozen guys for a full month pretending to be me. She told one guy I wanted kids by next year. She told another that I am looking for a traditional provider. It is honestly disgusting. I felt like my skin was crawling knowing some random dudes think they know me when they were actually flirting with a sixty year old woman in a sweater vest. I took the iPad back and told her she is blocked until she goes to therapy.

Now the whole family is blowing up my phone. My aunt called me a cold-hearted brat for hurting my moms feelings when she was just trying to help. They say I am sabotaging my own happiness and that I should have just thanked her for the effort and taken over the matches she found. I feel like my privacy was absolutely violated but they are making me out to be the villain because she meant well. I am just tired of the drama and honestly I might just stay single forever if this is the alternative .

My best friend of 13 years and I are both 18 and at the same university. About four years ago, she met a guy online via Discord who is a few years older. Over time, his behavior creeped me out—he spent hundreds of dollars on her, was completely obsessed, and forced her into making every decision for him.
I stopped talking to him a while ago after he made uncomfortable misogynistic/racist jokes and asked me to do and to send him the results of a se*ual kink quiz when I was 16. Despite this, my friend kept hanging out with him constantly, even bringing him on calls during our irl hangouts and inviting him to our gaming sessions without telling me.
Recently, the three of us hopped on a new game. He started making insulting comments toward me, and when my friend temporarily disconnected, his attitude shifted completely. He told me, "I don't like you, you're only here because she wants you here, and it wouldn't make a difference if you left." Hurt, I left the call. The next day, I explained what happened to my friend. She apologized, and I told her I no longer wanted to play as a trio. She said she understood.
The very next day, my grandmother passed away. That evening, there was a sports game that my friend and I *always* watch together. When I asked her to watch it, she lied and said she couldn't because she had to study. However, once the game started, she texted me detailed reactions about the plays. It became obvious she was watching it with him instead—even though he doesn't even care about sports.
I am incredibly hurt that she lied to me just to ditch me for him, especially while I am grieving and needed my best friend there for me. Am I in the wrong for being mad at her?

Note for more detail: the guy is 22 and they met about 3~4 years ago. You guys can do the math. Also, he’s not from the same country as me and my friend, but they met irl about 3 months ago. Also, when I say he doesn’t care about the sport, he really doesn’t. He played Lego games Everytime we watched.

Alright yall, tell me(26f) if I’m wrong for feeling this way. My child’s father(29m) and I were dating but broke up when I found him cheating on me. I kicked him out and three days later I found out I was pregnant. We stayed broken up and didn’t talk much other then when he would ask how I’ve been feeling until about 5 months into the pregnancy where we then tried to make things work. I caught him cheating- telling other girls he wanted to get them pregnant and saying that I’m crazy and we aren’t together, posted him on the are we dating the same guy page and he’s apparently known as a force breeder and sends unwanted sexts and nudes- when I was 7 1/2 months along. We’ve been no contact since and recently went to dinner because I’m now due in 2w5d and we have to have some kind of ground to walk on when this child gets here.

Let’s get to what matters. This man wants my newborn baby to go with him Friday-Sunday 4 weeks after I give birth. He wants me to pump enough to supply him. He wants me to drive her to him (he lives an hour away!!!). He has made my entire pregnancy a horrible experience and now he wants to take my baby away for that long and I know it’s to play house with another fb girl or he’s going to pass her off to his mom. I want him to have a relationship with our daughter, but I think this ask is outrageous. I’m so stressed out I can’t even think straight. Am I wrong to think that what he’s asking is absolutely insane??

My dad and his wife have been married for 15 years and I'm pretty cordial with them. I'm 32 and I've lived on my own for almost a decade now, but sometimes they still act like I'm 16 and they're in charge of my life. They invited me to their big 15th anniversary party last weekend and I was planning on going, but then my dad called and asked if I could also bring over some of their old photo albums that I have. I said sure, no problem. Then my stepmom chimed in and basically demanded that I bring over a specific casserole dish that she really likes and also asked if I could pick up some of her medications from the pharmacy on my way because she "couldn't be bothered to make the trip herself." It was the tone more than the requests themselves, it felt like they were talking to a teenager again, not an adult.

I told them no. I said I'd bring the photo albums, but I wasn't going to be their personal errand runner for the party, especially since they had plenty of time to prepare and the pharmacy was right next to my house anyway. My dad got really upset and said I was being selfish and ungrateful, and that it was a small thing to ask for their anniversary. My stepmom then added that if I wasn't going to help out with the party preparations, maybe I shouldn't come at all. They've been sending me passive aggressive texts ever since. I was actually looking forward to seeing everyone, but after that phone call I don't want to go and be treated like I'm still under their roof and their rules. My brother thinks I'm overreacting and should have just done what they asked, but I feel like they were being really disrespectful of my time and my independence. Am I wrong for standing my ground?

My brother is 16 and got suspended for three days last week. The school called my parents because he and two other boys made a fake account using a classmate’s name and posted a bunch of disgusting stuff pretending to be him. It wasn’t just one dumb joke. They kept it going for almost a month, and apparently the kid had been getting blamed for things he never wrote. My brother admitted he helped make the account, but he keeps saying he “barely posted anything” and that everyone is acting like he ruined a life.

The problem is that he has a summer program interview coming up, and the suspension might come up because the school has to send a conduct form. My parents asked me to talk to one of the program coordinators, who happens to be someone I know from an old robotics club. They want me to say my brother got caught up in a group thing, that it was becuase of pressure from older kids, and that he’s definitley learned from it. I said no. I told them I’m not calling anyone to soften it, because I don’t actually believe he understands what he did.

Now everyone is treating me like I’m enjoying watching him lose an opportunity. My dad said siblings are supposed to help each other when things get serious, not “act like a judge.” My brother hasn’t apologized to the kid yet, at least not sincerely. He wrote one note because the school made him, then came home and complained that it sounded “too guilty.” I don’t want his whole future damaged over being stupid at 16, but I also don’t want to help rewrite what happened so he can dodge the first real consequence. Am I wrong here?

Our bathrooms are gender separated. I didnt want to keep bringing pads so I just put an unused one on the radiator and I hid it there. One of my coworkers apparently saw it and she started being hysterical how she saw the pad. I told her it was me and its a clean one so I can change later. I legit clean the bathroom too and I didnt think it would be weird to leave a pad because we are all women ? Plus it wasnt dirty. I told her it was mine and she said I shouldnt leave it there its not nice. I asked why was it made such a big deal since it was clean and I didnt think women would be uncomfortable with it? It was unopened and unused. I legit confronted them with their behavior they just brushed me off.

So Ive been at this little estate agents office for about two weeks. Theres six of us in total and no real HR because its such a tiny set up. The owner runs the place and the rest of us all do the same job. Im 24 and just qualified so this is my first proper job in the industry.

Theres this one woman in her mid fifties whos been weird with me from day one.

She never uses my actual name. Its always "the baby" or "kid" or "babs" and her favourite is "the trainee" even though shes on the exact same role and rate as me. I let it slide the first week because I figured shed knock it off once I wasnt new anymore.

But she didnt. By the end of last week she was doing it in front of customers in for viewings. So on the Tuesday I asked her as nicely as I could to just use my actual name because Im not a trainee and people coming in think Im on work experience. She laughed and said something about how Id miss being called

young one day so I should enjoy it and then carried on doing it anyway.

On the Thursday I went to the owner about it because it was starting to feel like proper bullying. He actually sighed at me when I brought it up and told me it was a "playground thing" and we should sort it out between ourselves. That was genuinely the phrase he used. So that was that.

This morning she came in with her usual "morning kiddo did baby get enough sleep" and I just looked at her and said "morning granny." She went really quiet and then went off to the kitchen and started crying and one of the others went after her. By about eleven Id had three people come over to my desk telling me I was completely out of order and that being called young is a compliment but being called old is "actually hurtful" and she didnt deserve that at her age.

Shes been off her desk all afternoon and the owner has now emailed me to ask if Id consider apologising to her tomorrow morning to "keep the peace." I emailed back saying Id apologise the same day she stops calling me baby in front of customers and not before.

AIW?

Hi everyone, I (24F) and my husband (26M) met 5 years ago. We were both poor, living with our parents, driving busted up cars, but extremely in love.
We moved in with each other, and found out i was pregnant early on, we now have 2 kids, (3F) and (6month old F). Our lives are pretty good and our marriage is solid… aside from money.
My husband wants me to stay home with our children like I have been, since i quit my job to take care of our first child we are always struggling to find our next meal. My credit is in the crapper now, I still drive a beat up car, we live in a 2bed/1bath 700sqft old apartment, and we never do anything fun, haven’t eaten out in over a year. Money isn’t everything, I fell in love for HIM not the money but I’m sick of living like this.
He doesn’t want me to put the girls in a daycare. I get it but tbh that’s a luxury we cant afford, plus, I want to work so bad! I get very little social interaction outside my babies, and well, they’re babies…..
He refuses, he wants me to homeschool them later too. I just can’t do it.
Minimum wage is $14/hr, he makes $16/hr, and that number changes frequently because this is also his 4th job THIS YEAR!! We are in MAY!! He will never commit, he will never strive for more. Because of it,this where I see myself in 10 years, constantly stressed out, aftepaying for diapers, asking family for money, wondering if my car will leave me stranded again
But is it worth divorcing over?
Splitting the family? Starting at square one living at my parents house? (Plus two kids). Finding another man? Morally it feels extremely selfish buts should I have to sacrifice my happiness??
Ugh
I need advice

I recently got money from a settlement i applied for, before i even got it i told my family I wanted to save most of it and not touch it unless I really had to. I grew up poor, so i wanted to start putting money aside for emergencies and for the future. I also have two trips planned this year and wanted to save money for that.

even with that fact my mom keeps making comments about me not spending my money or not giving her money when she asks. If I say no, she calls me cheap and says stuff like “I gave you money whenever you needed it.”
I was a full-time university student at the time and during those 8 months the only time i asked her for money was twice when i wasn’t able to use my credit card and when i had used up the funds my sponsor gave me for the month. When I came back home i paid her back what i owed and i also help with groceries and buy stuff for the house here and there.

Funny thing is that I recently bought her a brand new iPad Air 13” plus other things she wanted and she still acts like I’m selfish for not wanting to constantly spend my money or give it away.
I’ve paid off everything i’ve owed so I don’t owe anyone anything, but my family still makes me feel guilty just for having savings. whenever I say no, I end up feeling selfish and questioning myself even though I know I’m mostly just trying to be responsible with my money. am i wrong for not wanting to use my savings up?

Wussup Reddit. I never thought I’d end up here but here I am. So to preference this, I’m a M24 in a now year long Relationship with my gf F20, she is pregnant at 37 weeks.
This morning we had an ultra sound appointment at the hospital today that was scheduled for 11:00AM. She woke up and also woke me up at 10:40 and told me that she woke up late. I immediately get up and put all my clothes on. It’s now 10:45 or 10:46 and my stomach is killing me (I had some McDonald’s last night at like 12am)
I tell her that I needed to use the restroom cause my guts were straight bubbling. She was still getting dressed her self while telling me she wants to get there early in case we have to do paper work (I don’t see why that matters because once we are checked in before 11:10 because if the 10 minute grace period, that we are officially on time, which I told her but she disregarded that and told me she doesn’t care and that she wants to be there on time anyways because if we aren’t there at 11 the whole world is apparently going to end).
I spend like max 5 minutes in the bathroom because she was outside the door telling me to hurry up because she doesn’t want to be late so I cut my shit early and just suffer through the stomach ache I gave myself. As we are leaving to get in the car she’s telling me that she’s annoyed with me that I “don’t respect her time” and that “I don’t care that she gets stressed if we aren’t early to things.”
I tell her that I cut my bathroom trip extremely short and that I do respect her time and that is why I took so short in the bathroom. I tell her this, but she keeps on nagging at me that I still didn’t respect her time because she wanted to leave at 10:50 and we left at 10:52. I tell her again “I do respect your time and I’m sorry that we didn’t leave at exactly 10:50, but I needed to use the restroom badly”
She again keeps on talking condescendingly towards me saying “uhhh if you respected my time? we would’ve left at 10:50 and not 10:53 😬, so yeah you don’t respect me time at all.”
Now I start to get upset at this point because this feels extremely disrespectful and rude take it that my stomach is still hurting and I cut my bathroom break extremely short.
I tell her “if it was that serious that you are going to keep talking like this to me you could’ve just gone by yourself” I get this wasn’t the best thing to say at the moment but I was getting fed up with how disrespectful she was being at me for using the restroom. She understandably get upset at this and starts telling me that was mean and rude to say. And keeps telling me how much I don’t “respect her time”. I start talking to her in a more direct tone and she tells me that I’m being rude to HER.
I start getting more frustrated at this point because I was only speaking In a straightforward tone almost like if I was talking to a phone rep or something and say “yk what I’m sorry I made us late.” And I just stop talking and get on my phone. She starts crying and telling me that I don’t need to be rude just because she was stressed about being on time.
I tell her that’s not all she was doing or else I would’ve been more receptive and that she was getting on to me about something I couldn’t control and that we still have a 10 minute grace period to get there. She mentions the paper work thing AGAIN and I just go back into silence because she’s not listening to me. Now we get her ultra sound done, and got there at 11:06 (there was a train we avoided but we still got there ON TIME WITHIN THE GRACE PERIOD) after we left she again starts nagging em about not respecting her time and asking if she deserved for me to be rude to her and asking why I’m not acting normal(???).
I tell her I wasn’t being rude and that I was only speaking in a straight forward tone and that I felt disrespected because she keeps blatantly disregarding the fact that I did respect her time because I cut my restroom break as early as I could. We get home and she’s still in my ear saying I was now being rude and not respecting her time. At this point I’m absolutely fed up so I am talking in a bit of a ruder tone that I was this morning, simply because of how frustrated it is to be called something that I’m not and that being all her evidence for being upset at me. We get in the house while this is all happening, her still nagging me about not respecting her time and also now apparently being rude. I go in the bathroom finally and I am currently shitting my guts out finally. she starts bawling her eyes out on the other side and crying in the living room.
AITAH for using the restroom this morning?
I feel as though I am not “disrespecting her time” and that I actually did the opposite. I also understand she’s 37 weeks pregnant and that hormones are insane during this time. I’ve already spent my time with the berating and being screamed at for doing the smallest of things for 37 weeks, but I feel like this situation is getting to me. I’d also like to say I’ve already apologized for what I told her this morning about her going by herself if it was that serious yet she’s still upset about all of it despite her causing all of this. Would like y’all’s thoughts.

TLDR; gf is seeing my 5 minute bathroom break as disrespectful to her time because it made us late by a few minutes but still within our grace period.

Iv just gotten off night shift and I had an encounter that left me extremely anxious. At around 2 am a couple came in trying to buy cigarettes. Then they poured out there entire wallet only consisting of five cent coins. I said “I’m not counting out 60$ in 5 cents it’ll backup the line.”(tradies start around this time) They then started to berating me and calling me little girl and other weird derogatory things. I’m quite a small person and these people where tall and chunky so I just kinda stared at them before asking them to leave they then called me a racist and started screaming for the cook and kept calling me names until the cook was forced to serve them so they can leave the next few hours of my shift I was kinda zoned out because iv genuinely never witnessed anything like it, iv never been scared that a customer was going to hurt me even with other odd people. But I don’t know if I should have just sucked it up and counted out 1200 5 cent coins?

(I am not American things are more expensive here and we have different laws)

i know how the title looks so bear with me. my ex and i were together for five years and i thought we were solid, id actually been saving for a ring and was getting ready to propose, then about three weeks ago she sat me down out of nowhere and ended it. she was vague about why, said she needed a fresh start, and i was gutted but i let her go without a fight.

the next morning my phone went mad. mate after mate messaging me asking if it was true, all linking me to a long facebook post shed put up that night. in it she said the real reason we split was that id been quietly draining our joint savings for months and that she found out and had to get away from me before i bankrupted her. it got loads of comments, people i barely know piling in calling me every name going.

the thing is none of that happened, and i actually had the opposite proof. for the last few months shed been the one moving money out of our joint account into one i wasnt on, and id only found out because the bank flagged it to me, and on top of that id recently seen shed already signed a lease on a flat with the guy from her work shed been getting close to. shed planned her whole exit and dressed it up as me being the villain.

so instead of just denying it i commented on her post with screenshots of the account transfers and the dates, and said the real reason we broke up was that shed been setting up a new life with someone else on our shared money and didnt want anyone to know. people went quiet, then a lot of them turned on her, and she rang me screaming that i had no right to put our private finances on the internet.

i know two wrongs dont make a right and part of me feels grubby for airing it all in public, but she went first and she went nuclear with a straight up lie. am i wrong for setting the record straight the way i did?