Toxic parents/getting separated soon/cheating on one another
My parents are on the verge of separation since 3 years now my dad has been cheating on my mom since idk 10-12 years now we are currently facing poverty because of him because of his poor financial decisions he took loans went bankrupt and here we are we can afford basic things like monthly rent and food and lower class education for my brother nothing more than that , that too on my mom's salary my dad is unemployed and most of the time stays with his side chick but I've seen him slap my mom , I've woken up from the noise of cussing each other in the morning and I've seen his fragile little male ego get hurt and then turn into a violent husband my mom has endured all this since a long time but she is no less ik she also needs a partner but she has multiple partner at one time most of them are only on talking terms but still although I don't have a say in that but it has affected me and my younger brother so much we cannot do what we want to do cannot buy things have to think twice before showing interest in something and mind you we were doing so good financially before the bankruptcy so it's a bit hard to see this phase it's my drop year currently and I cannot study because of this environment of my house I've joined a Library but that also works to an extent because I've to come back home and because of my migraine and some vitamin deficiency I feel drowsy I have blackouts and all and today my dear friends my dad had a fight with his mother and also my paternal grandparents are also toxic with my mom although my mom is handling all the expenses and my dad does nothing still that typical scene where parents blame women yeah that scenario and my grandpa hates both my mom and dad but my grandmother is biased but today after getting into fight with me grandma my dad is silent since morning and it was normal to me I'm used to it but now in the evening he told me to not ask him for anything and he told me he had wasted the money for my coaching of 2 years (he didn't even pay it , one of our family dr sponsored my education for 2 years) and I agree I didn't do well in that maybe because of my dumbness because of my slow learning ability or because of my family but I failed I prepared again but I couldn't do well again neither in neet nor in cuet (entrance exams for college mbbs and courses other than medicine respectively ) I have a Little hope for re neet but lets see what happens, yeah back to story and he told me that you are on your own now and all that excuse me sir? You have been living with your side chick for 3 years now you have never checked on us you only used to come when she used to go somewhere else that too only for food so I'm on my own since 3 years. And mind you I haven't asked for a single penny from him since 4 years and when I did I didn't get anything so basically I've not taken money from him since 4 years and today I asked for it for my library fee and he denied so I took it from my grandpa because I had no other choice left but I think thats the thing which triggered him and he abused my mom after that. Tbh , I hate living here I do try my best but I cannot do anything I argue back and I make him shut his fucking mouth but I just don't want him to turn violent on my mom because I can't let my younger one see that and I cannot see my mom suffer . He's not someone who drinks and smokes but you know how he is. I used to think sometimes in between that maybe he failed as a husband , son , businessman but he's a good dad but he makes sure that I don't live in delusion and gives me a reality check from time to time.
So yeah that was it I will really appreciate some advice and tips on how to leave this house asap.
Thankyou.