Advice on a situationshippy FWB
So this one is a bit of a doozy…
I have a friend I met back in 2023. Up until a few months ago, we’d only hung out in groups but one night, we happened to find ourselves alone… one thing led to another, and… yeah.
At the time, we both thought it would just be a one-time thing, but then it happened again… and again… and again. Then we started hanging out one-on-one outside of sex…
We set boundaries with each other that we’re both just looking to build a friendship with each other and have fun as well, but lately the signals have been getting a bit uhh mixed? He’ll initiate PDA in front of our friends (they’ve noticed and commented), we’ll both sit next to each other when we’re all hanging out, he’s invited me to group hangouts as his “plus-one”, etc
We talked about it a few weeks ago and re-affirmed that we just want to be FWBs, but we also acknowledged that we’re developing a deep bond with each other. I felt clarity after that talk, but the mixed signals haven’t stopped and now I’m starting to get confused.
Here’s my struggle: I’ve come to really care about this guy, and more than anything I want us to continue building a deep friendship. We both see each other in a way few others do, which is something we both have needed. I also would love to keep the sex going, but it’s hard enough to keep my own feelings in check without even factoring in the signals he keeps sending.
On one shoulder, I’ve got a voice telling me to chill on the physical stuff if the friendship is truly what I value the most. No need to keep going and risk messing that up or even losing it altogether. At the same time, the voice on the other shoulder argues that the sex/PDA has only enhanced our connection, and that I should just keep my own mind/feelings in check and continue on as is.
Advice? Also - I would love to talk to one of our mutual friends about this, but I worry that doing that would constitute me admitting that something more serious is/may be happening, which I don’t really want to do… to them, at least. How should I approach it, if at all?