r/Situationships

I'm 25F .. my friend is 25M.. we have known each other since 2020.... he is 6 months younger to me.. we know each other since college.. we studied together from the second year of engineering... he is my best friend.. everyone in college thought we were together.. he said he liked me right in the beginning.. but i said i don't.. he said it's okay and our friendship continued... I liked him too.. but i don't know whether it was lust or something else.. in 4th year we got a little involved physically...it was due to the heat of the moment.. didn't do anything much .. since the past 3 yrs we got lot more physically involved...didn't have sex but we kissed.. went up till 3rd base... maybe just 3 times in 3 years.. we sexted each other a lot...

Every night I think of us.. spending time together... making love..

All this while he kept telling he loves me..i know he loves me..he is veryy genuine.. always cares.. always puts efforts..how much ever i push him away. He always kept coming back.. he is the greenest flag

It's been more than 5yrs since he has told he loves me.. I've been pushing it.. maybe my heart loves him too..

I want more of him..when we meet ..and he leaves..i miss him so much... I'm usually not a person who stays connected to ppl but when it is him i want to talk to him every day..

I always wanted to marry the person i dated.. I'm kind of perfectionist and wanteverything to be perfect.. I come from middle class family..in childhood i had to compromise on lot of things cos of money... to study well amd save...

When it comes to his family..i really don't like them.. they don't really have anything much.. my parents after struggling andsaving so much have done some things for me and my sister...

Both of us are in good job now.. he earns more than me and really well..

He's that kind of person who's so easy going.. Goes to gym.. office.. eats sleeps amd loves traveling.. in this 5yrs never thought of anyone else expect me

When I think about the marriage part with him..i feel like running away and not wanting this..he has a useless sister too who spends his money like crazy..does nothing

All this irritates me.. my parents said let's start searching for marriage next year.. I'm really confused..abt him...i don't know whetehr i love him..is it just physical lust or actual love

When he doesn't talk to me i feel very bad.. he says he'll wait for me until the day i get married..

Sometimes i feel i should meet some boys in arranged marriage and see what i really want...

Some one help me please......

TL;DR: Me 'F/23' and him 'M/24' 7 year situationship almost I’m not saying he’s lying, but does anyone else deal with a partner constantly hinting that “people told them something” or vaguely accusing you of stuff without actually saying what happened?

Like yes, I know information can get back to him sometimes, and he pretty much already knows everything important anyway. But this has become a regular thing. He’ll randomly act weird, imply I did something, say people told him things, or accuse me vaguely — then refuse to explain because “it doesn’t matter” or “you’ll just lie.”

That’s what confuses me. If you truly think I did something and want honesty, why bring it up just to stay vague and create tension? It’s starting to feel less like communication and more like a tactic to get a reaction, start an argument, make me anxious, or get me to confess to something.

Am I overthinking this, or has anyone else dealt with this kind of behavior?

Dated a guy for months and found out he was texting other girls behind my back and lying this whole time. Maybe even went on dates and more. We were “exclusive” he said, whatever, in the end I was probably just a situationship for him.

I ended whatever we had. Got no apology, explanation or whatsoever, but I still have his stuff. I don’t know what I should do with it. Should I text him so he can pick it up or something? Or just wait till he (maybe) texts me about it?

Idk this situation is eating me alive. It has been a week…

For context: I’m a woman from Belgium and he’s a Colombian guy. We met online like a week ago and since then we’ve been texting every day + having long calls almost daily.

The thing is: by text he’s dry af 😭 I’m very much a “yapper” and he replies like a military NPC sometimes. BUT on calls he’s genuinely sooo sweet, affectionate and emotionally present. We have this constant “we’re just friends 👀” banter while also acting emotionally attached at the same time.

I honestly don’t want a serious relationship with him. I like the dynamic exactly because it feels light, playful and emotionally exciting without the pressure of something official.

But recently he was less attentive with me during the day and I noticed he followed a bunch of new girls on Instagram… and I got lowkey jealous 😭 Not because I want him to be my boyfriend, but because I still want to feel special to him.

So now I’m confused about myself.

Am I contradicting myself? Do you think I’m lying to myself and I actually like him more seriously than I admit?

Also, what do you talk about with your situationship?

gut is trying to tell me something?

My boyfriend and I have been together for 2 years. I’m 35 F tall blonde and fit He is 42 M not super fit but handsome and we have intimacy every time we are together. We’ve already been having major relationship issues because I caught him going to multiple AMP and it deeply damaged my trust. Since then I’ve been hypervigilant and honestly questioning everything.
He’s a firefighter. Yesterday he worked all day, then went to a firefighter party/bar thing with coworkers. Around midnight I called him and he told me he was at a 25-year-old male coworker’s house “talking about firefighter stuff.” He stayed there until around 2am. During those 2 hours I called/texted multiple times and got no response.
Now my brain is going into overdrive wondering if this is normal firefighter bonding/drinking after work… or if something else could be going on. I’ve even started questioning if he could be secretly into men because of how much secrecy and lying I already feel exists in our relationship after the massage parlor situation.
I did see the coworker’s social media and my brain immediately started analyzing his appearance/body language/etc which I know sounds irrational. I honestly can’t tell anymore if I’m picking up on real red flags or if my anxiety and broken trust are making me paranoid.
is it normal for guys to hang at each other’s houses until 2am after work/bar nights? Or does this sound off to you too?
Please be honest but kind because I know I’m emotionally spiraling right now.

so there’s this guy at my school who is an exchange student and he is very funny and nice and stuff and i developed a crush on him blah blah blah all that junk and then we were hanging out one on one a TON recommended me albums met my friends everything’s going well i tell him how i feel he says he doesnt see me that way but loves hanging out with me so im like cool i guess friendship but like we continued hanging out one on one to the point where he told me i was his best friend like a week after i told him how i felt. like bruh you like me enough to be my best friend but not to date me that’s gurt but he’s still tip toeing the line between messing with me and genuinely just trying to be friends which i hate. typically when i feel like a guy is getting closer to me than id like to be without dating i know that’s when time to drop but because it’s so on the line im just riding it out. today we spent the entire day together. we were sitting on my couch and he said it’s cold and i had a blanket on and pointed out another blanket he could grab tell me why he starts sharing my blanket hello stop why youre a boy i’m a girl we can be friends but can we be friends to this level idk what do i do

so this guy and I were texting non stop for about a month, and hung out a couple times (which was great). then we slowly started texting less and less over a couple weeks and now we don’t really text. he still sends me Instagram reels, like what does that mean? I still see him a couple times a week (in group settings) and we act like everything is normal and still laugh and joke around? I feel like I lowkey got ghosted but then I still see him in person, so i don’t really know what to call it?

He’s very nice to me, for example insisting to pay for everything, providing emotional support, doing things he doesn’t like to do, but do it with me anyways, and helping me study for stuff that he already did and don’t need to study, etc. And when we hangout, he’s almost never scrolling or texting others, and I can use his phone since I know his password.

But, he also pushes me away. He says if he finds a gf, he will leave me but introduce his gf to me (the same if I find a bf). And he also jokes that he is gay (obviously not he has an ex girlfriend, and he doesn’t look like gay at all, and he also asks me for female friends…). He also calls me bro, and texts like a bro too.

It’s very conflicting. I just want to know how he feels about me. Is he avoidant? (I am an avoidant myself too, but I can’t imagine spending so much time and money on someone I don’t like, but I can imagine pushing someone away like this because I did the same tbf, I said he was a good bro a good friend etc.)

I was in a very short but intense situationship with this guy I had great chemistry and vibed with. But it got really messy quickly when he kept on giving mixed signals and insist on being friends but only to be romantic towards me (ie: kissing me after saying he only saw us a friends).

We went no contact for two months. After coming out of my first relationship, I knew it was a very dumb idea if I initiated or reached out to him. Two weeks ago he sends me the following text, “hey u doing okay.” It took me like a few days to respond and I told him that I had been going through some very difficult times both personally and financially. He responded to the initial texts by being understanding and apologizing for what he did. But when he asked what the situation was and I elaborated, he simply made a light hearted joke about it.

Since then, I haven’t responded to his text message which was something stupid. But I’m just confused. Why did he even reach out if he wasn’t going to be engaged or go out of his way to reconnect?

The guy I lost my virginity to just blocked me after I told him how I felt (which was “always sad about him”). I don’t know how to feel right now. Any advice or literally anything is appreciated. I kinda feel like I’m too much and not enough at the same time.

I dated a guy for 4 months. We had a very strong connection, same interests, similar values, etc. We got on well pretty fast. Even though we never were boyfriend and girlfriend “formally”, we basically played or acted like we were.
After those 4 months he slowly started teasing that he couldn’t keep on going with the relationship because of his personal life. In his words, he didn’t want to drag me to his problems and wanted to keep me “safe”. It is true that he has a complex life, but it would never occur to me that he would let go of us just because of that. However, i know that he is scared of getting hurt again because of his past relationship and I believe that is a huge factor of why he didn’t want to commit. In spite of that, he’s still in contact with his ex.
When he broke up with me he made clear that he really cared about me and valued me as a person, and because of that he wanted to remain friends. What does that even mean? Would he eventually want to get back together?
In this point in time we are friends who eventually hang out, but it feels as if nothing changed. Sometimes we simply hang out and others we end up hooking up.
have you guys ever been in this situation? what do you think made him make that decision?

Me and this girl talked from like November to February. She confessed she liked me in January, valentines in February. She ended it a week later. We were really close friends before and super quick after she ended it we started to go back to that. About a month after she ended it tho we actually hung out the first time. There was obviously still tension and she ended up asking to be Friends with benefits. I accept yk bc I rlly want her and that was the next best thing. PLOT TWIST. We hangout officially for the first time as friends w benefits and it’s nowhere near what FWB is supposed to be like. It was like we were a happy couple again, just flirting cuddling stuff like that. That went on for the next 3 hangouts. We never hooked up because it felt more than that. Only like goodbye pecs bc we weren’t rushing anything. But then again she got distant and ended it after about 3 weeks. We’re slowly becoming friends again and we hung out on Saturday. It wasn’t like it was just us it was us and like 3 other friends. I was pretty awkward at first but by the end of the night we were like talking and like the spark was there again but just not in a romantic way. We have plans to hangout again with a smaller group. How do I slowly get her to fall back in love with me? I’m in no rush, willing to play the long game.

So there is this one guy I'm talking to we are talking since few months now and we have a great bond the thing is yesterday when we were talking i asked him why did u decide to text me and after asking 2 3 times he said oh I mixed u up w another girl I got the ick I do like him but I can't get it out of my head now any opinions?

So me and my situationship have been texting for almost a year now and we keep sending eachother nudes, and I’ve liked him pretty much ever since we started texting. I tried giving him hints here and there, but I honestly can’t tell if he ignores them or just genuinely doesn’t get them.

The thing is, over time I started planning to just confront him and tell him how I feel so I could finally know where we stand. But at the same time, he keeps leaving me on delivered for days or even weeks, acts really dry now, and honestly just doesn’t seem to care that much anymore. Whenever I bring it up or question it, he keeps giving the same excuse that he’s “busy,” but who is really that busy for weeks at a time?

At this point I was thinking of just confessing and seeing what happens because I’m tired of wondering, but I’m also scared I’m wasting my time and making myself look dumb. Should I tell him how I feel or is this already my answer?

I genuinely need outside perspectives because I’m driving myself insane.

I (25F) was seeing a guy (26M) for a while and the dynamic felt very relationship-like: staying over, cuddling, affectionate moments outside of sex, meeting multiple friend groups (of his), future travel talk, opening up emotionally, good sex, deep conversations, him noticing little things about me and reassuring me when I opened up.

At different points though, he also said things like I wasn’t really his type (even though I’m similar to the kinds of girls he’s dated in the past/ currently follows) / he didn’t see me that way, despite also saying he was a “relationship person”.

Eventually I stepped away because I realised I’d developed real feelings and the ambiguity was hurting me.

What I cannot stop circling is: why?

I understand people can enjoy someone and still not want a relationship, but I’m struggling because it didn’t feel casual at all. This is a guy that drove 14 hours to see me for one night, set up camping trips for the two of us, changed plans with his friends just to travel and see me (without much coaxing from my end).

If you genuinely have chemistry, attraction, emotional intimacy, shared values, great sex and enjoy being around someone, what stops someone from choosing that?

For some context, he’s going overseas for a few months soon. For a while, I thought that might have been the reason - I’d also want to be single for that experience - but if that was the case, he would have just used that as an excuse to”out”, rather than saying he wasn’t interested in me.

I’m not really asking “am I enough?” I think I’m trying to understand whether there are reasons people walk away from things that seem good on paper that aren’t just “they weren’t attracted enough” or “you weren’t good enough.”

So people who’ve turned down someone you genuinely liked: why?

I 27F met this guy 29M in university years ago and we were hanging out since. We grew super close over time but he told me from the very beginning that he wasnt ready for a relationship. I still fell for him and confessed my feelings and he rejected me multiple times (I know, embarrassing). But despite all that, we would act like a couple and do absolutely everything together. I dont understand why he would keep me around without wanting to be my bf. He is super touchy with me and holds my hand in public. I met his mom and his friends and they all liked me. I feel so stupid having wasted YEARS on this guy just for him to never reciprocate those feelings abd just keeping me around for some reason. He recently told me he wanted to date other women and it broke me. I just cant do this anymore. We had a fight yesterday and i blocked him since then. Im not sure how long we will be no contact and i dontbwanna keep inflicting this pain on me. Does it ever change? Do fhese situationships ever become relationships? Or am i just delusional.

I DMd him late last night (i deleted his number) as I was really down bad and going through something. I thought this would’ve been a good way for me to finally give up on him and get closure.

I just sent him a “hey it’s been a while but was thinking of you today so wanted to say hi, hope you’ve been doing well.”

Woke up this morning with deep regret and unsent the message but i feel like he definitely saw the notification…

Not really sure what to do but I feel pathetic as I was doing so well doing no contact for 6 months after finally ending our three month situationship.

Hey y'all. I met this guy online. We hooked up 3 times. By every hook up he got more distant. After a few days after we hang out the last time I asked him if we wants to meet up this week again and he said he can't and I texted him that he let me know when he wants to meet up again. But he never responded. Before he was sending some reels on ig, liked something but now nothing. Well a day before I asked him about this week he did like my pic on ig. Oh and when I went back home last time he said see you next time. I'm confused. Is it over or not? What should I do? I feel so bad because I really like him. Help me...