Would you consider this to be cheating?
This is not my main account for obvious reasons.
I have been in a relationship with my boyfriend for almost a year and a half. We are in a monogamous relationship and, as we have discussed before the agreement is no hooking up with other people or having an account on apps such as Grindr, etc.
As far as I'm aware of, he has been faithful. I know I certainly have honored our agreement.
We are both the same age (in our thirties). The relationship has always been semi long distance. We lived in two different cities about 2/3h away from each other, but we always see each other on the weekends, and have stayed in each other's homes for up to a week at a time (because we both work remote) and we also spend all of our off days together. I have been in long distance relationships before and it never used to work for me, but for some reason, I am 100percent committed to him and I know and I can feel it that he is committed to me, too. A couple of months ago, he had to move abroad (to a different continent!) and even though it's been much, much harder since then, with the physical and the time difference, we are still making it work. I am going to visit him next month for a few weeks and the long term plan is for me to move there but it is proving to be very difficult for me to land a job there.
The main issue is, before I met my boyfriend, I uploaded several photos of my body to one of the NSFW subreddits, only a couple of times. I don't know why, I think I was feeling lonely at the time, and I went through a series of several breakups and toxic relationships that year, so making these posts felt validating somehow, it also the reaction of the redditors gave me hope that I am still desirable, even though I'm getting older and it's harder to stay in shape. Ever since we started dating, I only uploaded twice, once very early in our relationship when I still wasn't sure where the relationship was going, and once while I was on a business trip bored out of mind. I felt that helped me stay off the apps. I received some comments and texted with some guys on here for a day or two, but it was mostly chit chat and small talk, nothing too sexual, and nothing ever happened nor was I looking for something to happen.
Obviously, my boyfriend is not aware of this. I don't think this is cheating per se, but it is questionable, and sometimes I do feel a little guilty about it. And what's worse, I have caught myself wanting to post more photos to that subreddit. Probably, because our relationship is truly a long distance relationship now, and the future is very, very uncertain. He cannot come back here and I am afraid I will not be able to find a job where he is at.
Would you consider this cheating or not?