Evidence on first time leaving 9-month-old with family babysitters for several hours + bedtime?
Hi everyone,
I’m looking for evidence-based input, not just reassurance, because I’m feeling very anxious and would like to understand what the research actually says.
I am a stay at home freelancing mom. My baby will be around 9 months old when I need to work 4 days at a festival in our city. My husband will be bringing her to the festival some days for a few hours, and would like us to leave her with his brother and sister-in-law for the last day so he can see a few concerts. They have three children themselves and are loving/responsible people. My baby does know them a little, but they are not regular caregivers.
They would babysit her in our own apartment, so she would be in her familiar home environment with her own bed, toys, smells, routines, etc. The plan would be approximately 6 hours of awake time with them and their three kids, including walks, play, meals, and then they would put her to bed. Neither of us parents would be there (but can be there within 1-2 hours). This would be the first time she is away from both of us for that long, and also the first time someone else puts her to bed without either parent present.
My question is: from an attachment/developmental science perspective, is this likely to be harmful or “traumatic” for a 9-month-old if she is with kind, responsive caregivers who she knows somewhat? Or is it more likely to be stressful/upsetting in the moment but not damaging, assuming she is comforted and cared for?
I know separation anxiety can peak around this age, and I’m trying to distinguish between “this may be hard and she may cry” versus “this could harm her attachment/security.”
Also, is there evidence supporting a gradual approach, e.g. shorter practice separations first, caregiver spending time with her while parents are present, familiar bedtime routine, comfort objects, check-ins, etc.?
I’d really appreciate research, expert sources, or developmental psychology perspectives on:
- age-appropriate separation at around 9 months
- first-time babysitting without parents present
- whether bedtime without parents changes the equation
- what factors make this safer/easier for the baby
- whether distress during separation predicts harm, or whether responsive caregiving and reunion matter more
Thank you.