u/EasternJaguar4968

Call me Lorenzo, 27 M, a gayman

Kaninang umaga, habang nagda-drive ako mag-isa, I caught myself asking a question I’ve been avoiding for a while.

Hanggang kailan ba okay maghintay sa taong hindi naman ako pinipili?

Ang funny kasi when you care deeply, ang dali mong i-justify lahat. “Busy lang siya.” “Maybe hindi pa right timing.” “Baka one day…”

Takot ako kasi baka before you know it, ikaw na lang pala ang kumakapit sa possibility.

Heyyyy. Call me Lorenzo, not my real name, but the name of my TVD crush. I’m into femme gays, but not crossdressers.

After my breakup with my ex-boyfriend almost half a decade years ago, I did try dating again. Pero wala talaga. I guess my heart was still closed off.

Then suddenly, my best friend introduced me to someone.

He was femme and super kalog. The first time I saw him, I remember thinking, “WTF, parang pwede ’to.”

To make the story short, I reached out. We met several times. We built a connection.

And then… I don’t know. He suddenly stopped showing up. Maybe I got ghosted. I honestly don’t know if he’s going through something or struggling with something right now, but I think I needed to know. It seems like he’s isolating himself these days because even our mutual friend hasn’t heard from him.

It bothers me a little, especially because I was already starting to expect na maybe this could turn into something more. Based on how comfortable we were with each other, it felt like we were heading in that direction.

Now, my friends are getting married. They’re building families. Some of them are planning to settle down.

And here I am, still trying to figure things out.

I wonder how he is now, and I genuinely hope he’s okay.

But I also wonder where this life is taking me.

Will I find the kind of love I’m hoping for?

Or am I simply learning that life doesn’t always follow the timeline we imagined for ourselves?