Disclaimer:
I wrote this post to get outside perspectives. I’ve tried to keep it as neutral as possible and remove any bias.
What I consider “basic hygiene / baseline habits”:
- Brush teeth in the morning
- Brush teeth before bed
- Wear clean clothes
- Whoever gets out of bed last makes the bed
- Clean up after yourself (e.g., if you make a mess, take care of it)
- Shower regularly (at least twice week as a minimum, typically more based on activity)
- Set aside time to clean the house together (about once every two weeks)
- Exercise around 3 times per week
What my gf doesn’t agree are basic hygiene and are more lifestyle preferences:
- Brush teeth in the morning
- Wear clean clothes
- Whoever gets out of bed last makes the bed
- Shower regularly (at least twice week as a minimum, typically more based on activity)
- Exercise around 3 times per week
Context:
My girlfriend and I have different views on what should be considered “basic” habits. I tend to view the list above as a reasonable baseline for day-to-day living. She feels that some of these go beyond what most people would consider basic, and sees them more as optional or lifestyle preferences rather than minimum expectations.
We recently had a conversation about this and thought it would be helpful to get outside opinions on where people generally draw the line between “basic hygiene” and “personal standards.”
Additional context around exercise:
Exercise has been a recurring point of discussion for us. In the past, I was very active (lifting multiple times per week, playing volleyball, running races). There was a period where I stopped being active, but I’ve recently started working out again at a reduced level.
I personally place a high value on staying active and have encouraged her to work out a few times per week as well. I’m aware that I can come across too strongly when it comes to this, especially when expectations aren’t met, and that’s something I’m working on.
Question:
AITA for thinking the above list is basic hygiene or are those personal standards / lifestyle standards that are too high?