My boyfriend [36M] wants to spend so much time with his family that I [35F] feel like I’m dating them too
I moved across the country to be with my long distance partner about 3 years ago. I did this knowing that he’s close with his family and with knowledge that we’d spend a bit of time with them.
However, in the last year or so, intimacy has started to take a bit of a back seat and I’m realizing that he and I just aren’t taking time to connect like we should. Part of me feels that this is because he wants to spend the whole weekend with family while we’ve pretty much stopped doing anything 1:1 with one another. Theres no time to be cute or romantic because even when I pitch something like going out of town or doing something new, he’ll throw in his parents as an add on. When I start to feel a little bit worn out on family stuff and stay home to do personal projects, he’ll make comments about how I don’t ever want to spend time with his family—when I do so at least two weekends per month.
When I try to address this, he makes me feel like such an asshole—like I don’t like them or something. And this really isn’t the case because they are lovely people. I just want some time with my partner back.
Any advice would be helpful because I honestly don’t know if I’m being the asshole by trying to set a boundary. Do you all think there is a fine line where family time has pretty much takes over a relationship?