u/Educational-East2761

I have offically drawn the boundary I do not want to be around her even if she has one sip of alcohol. i will stand up and leave the room/event.

I have offically told her I need to detach from enabling her addiction and hiding her addiction. I will no longer save her from her own reality.

I am going to the gym. I am now benching 105lbs as a beginner and a woman, my leg press is at 400lbs. I am taking care of myself and my body while she is at home and likely very upset because of what happened this weekend. I need to allow her to live in her own consequences.

This is very hard. All i wanna do is run back upstairs and try to fix it all but I can’t live like this anymore.

When you have been together a long time, financially depend on them, or grew up together it’s so hard.

I feel no pride in her actions. I know no matter what I say she won’t stop on my account. She started naltrexone this winter and the first few times she drank on it she was so in control and had 2-3 like everyone else. Honeymoon is over. We are back where we were. Rock bottom incoming. Again.

She blacked out this weekend. “Missed” her meds on accident. I think she may have done ketamine. Idk. Can’t tell when she’s lying anymore, too tired to figure it out.

My plans for the next few weeks are to aggressively build my cleaning business. I want to clean houses and become more independent as a precaution.

This just sucks. I’m trying to protect myself. It’s so hard. Nobody else sees what i see.