u/Educational_Rain8487

I don’t eat healthy food I don’t eat enough or I eat to much, which leads to me starving myself. I have liver inflammation, and my stomach is clogged. Instead of my mother realizing the threat in this situation she choose to make fun of me for it. When ever I say I feel lightheaded she’ll say something like “well it’s your fault for not eating” when I was 6 I was severely cautious of what my body looked like I would get mad if I looked fat. I was also depressed at this age due to constant yelling and physical abuse and mental abuse. Anyways sorry off task, but no one takes me seriously anymore my sister makes fun of me as well blaming me for my eating disorder…I genuinely cannot take this anymore I want to end my suffering but I’m to scared if it will hurt when I take my life. I met a lot of people and I don’t want to hurt them by leaving them; I hope I can recover and will find some better support… [F] 14

I really need help I’m not really sure if this is normal or not but every time I’ve been yelled at I can’t help but imagine me killing them in the most gruesome way possible! Today my mom was yelling at me because I wasn’t very social at all volleyball game (we lost) and in the car my sister started to instigate trying to make me feel bad about myself. At this point I’m holding back tears so I don’t appear weak in front of my mom and sister, but I literally cannot help but imagine me skinning my sister and poking her nerves until she passes out, same goes for my mom I imagined me biting into her neck and ripping her skin. I know this is off top but I always wanted to bite someone to the point of agonizing pain to the person I’m biting—always I’m getting off topic sorry!! I’m really scared if I’ll kill someone or just get them hurt. I just really hope I can find someone who can understand me and can possibly help me out? (I’m a minor btw 14)