Muscimol return me to reality, and i want to understand what is wrong with me
I am, 34M, have long term issues with my psychic. Recently I was at home alone like 1.5 month (my girlfriend was in funeral of her mother, and i am hiding from military draft).
When i sat at home, i felt that every emotion became more bright, like guitar string in my head is sounded, like sun or something like that. Of course it was nearly impossible for me to working or do anything at all, because i didn’t had an energy for it at all.
after some time, i eated microdosed panther amanita, and, in my surprise, i grounded really good. I cleaned apartments and worked much better than before.
Before it I regularly had depression episodes with suicidal thoughts of course, it was like my normal life vibe.
But after amanita… I like move out from circle of pain.
What is wrong with me? I tried to work with some psychologists but it was useless. It is so strange to become more realistic after mushrooms to be honest.