I wrote a children’s book and it was my first book and I would like a little bit of feedback
The Sad Sunflower
By Michael Carty
There once were two happy, bright and colorful little sunflowers, named Sunny and Freda. They would dance, talk, laugh and sing day after day! They were always glad to see the sun come up in the morning. But they could never guess what was coming to their little corner of paradise.
One day the wind blew a tiny seed into their field, and once it took root, it started to grow. Freda, ever the early riser, woke up to find a tiny little thing in the ground, and was completely mesmerized. When Sunny woke up, she was excited to start her day, then she saw Freda staring at something.
“What is that?” Sunny said.
Freda replied, “I don’t know, but it could be fun!”
Sunny wasn’t really very interested.
“It must be one of those trees we’ve heard about,” Freda continued.
“But it’s so small,” Sunny said
“That’s how they start. Right now, it’s just a sprout.”
“Well whatever it is, I think we should leave it alone,” Sunny said firmly.
Now, when Sunny and Freda started to dance and play, Freda was still just a little bit distracted—watching the sprout grow.
Some days later, Sunny woke up to Frida squealing with joy.
“Sunny, wake up!”
“But it’s so early,” Sunny replied.
She opened her eyes to see that the tiny sprout had become a sapling. Sunny, still wasn’t impressed.
“What’s so great about that? If you want something cool, check out my new dance moves!” Sunny said
Barely able to conceal her disappointment at her friend's lack of interest, Freda turned back to her blooming project.
*Sigh* “Maybe later.”
This left Sunny so confused. Freda would always love to dance with Sunny.
It’ll be okay, Sunny thought. Once the tree grows up, she’ll be back to her old self.
“Okay Freda we can watch it grow until it's all done.”
So Sunny watched with Freda as the sapling became a small tree.
Sunny noticed that Freda’s leaves had the creepings of an insipid gray.
“Hey Freda, are you okay?” Sunny ask.
Freda gave a smile. “Never better.”
Yet day after day, Freda was losing her color: her once bright yellow petals faded to a dull pale. But anytime Sunny would ask about her, Freda, with a smaller and smaller smile, would say:
“Never better—did you see the new branch?”
By the time the tree was all grown up, Freda couldn’t even lift her petals.
“Freda please, are you really okay?” Sunny pleaded with her best friend.
Freda didn’t even look at her this time.
“Please leave me alone Sunny.”
Sunny didn’t know why Freda was so sad. So she looked at the big tree. It took up all of Freda’s time.
Since it started growing, Freda stopped having time for the things that made her happy. Like playing in the sun! It was blocking the sun—that was what had made them so happy before!
That’s the problem! Maybe I could use my petals to give Freda some sun. Then Freda would be happy again!
Excitedly, Sunny waited for the next day to come. She was awake before the sun even Freda! When the sun peeked above the clouds, light spilling across the sky, Sunny opened her petals and leaves as wide as she could muster!
All day Sunny stood—but Freda continued to droop.
The sun sank and disappeared.
Nothing happened, Freda didn’t even notice.
By now, Freda’s pale yellow had become a wrinkled brown. Freda was still sad. Sunny felt like giving up.
But then she took a breath, went over to Freda, and said:
“I know you don’t feel like dancing or playing today, so I’ll stay with you. And I’ll be happy with you—even though you’re sad.”
With the little strength she had, Freda looked at Sunny and gave her a full smile.
She didn’t have much strength, but she had her friend.
Although there wasn’t as much color, there were still two happy sunflowers.