I’m a music student interested in how poly/ENM people relate to music
Hi, im am reading the undergraduate music tripos at Cambridge uni, and am very interested in the ways music interacts and connects with people's lives :)
this is not formal research, fieldwork, or a survey, and I’m not collecting data for publication. I’m just trying to learn and think more carefully, because there seems to be very little academic writing on polyamory and music specifically.
i would love any comments on anyone comfortable to share about whether being poly/ENM has affected your musical life. i imagine its not like extremely different from being mono, but (as listed below) i want to know if there may be some unique musical differenced specifically relating to being poly. or if not, then yk thats interesting too and i would like to know about that.
just interested in thoughts and ideas.
ive seen poly-specific playlists, which seem to be music that openly discusses polyamory (though this is pretty rare rn) or songs that can be interpreted in a poly-esk way (eg Panic!'s Girls/Girls/Boys), but also mono songs that dont push the possessive soulmate fairytale, but would like to know more about how songs are chosen for these playlists, how they are used, how people feel about them, etc.
ive also read in a post about using music to separate partners. in that, a song associated with one partner is purposefully avoided when hanging out with another partner to try and separate associating and keep full attention on the current partner. is this something everyone does? i find this super super interesting, and something i would have never thought about in my own listening and associations with music and friends/partner(s).
also just general musical listening for poly people in a mono-normative world is something very new for me to try and empathise with, but i can imagine it gets exhausting or probably desensitised atp maybe?
no pressure to answer any of these specifically. I’d be grateful for any thoughts, corrections, or experiences people feel comfortable sharing. I’m especially interested in avoiding assumptions, so disagreement is welcome too.
thnx so much ❤️ love to all