u/Efficient_Tomorrow57

▲ 2 r/OCPoetry

The man that I am

The man that I am

Is wild. Unpredictable. Impulsive. Lacking of self control. I make mistakes, sure. But I am transparent. I am on display for all around me to dissect.

I am also fantastic. I put my heart into everything I do. Full fledge, no holding back. Being a dad. A boss. A coworker. A drunk. Putting my life into a career that the idea of is no excitement to me, except I want to be excellent at it. I want to be the best. A husband….

Sometimes I outrage because of how much I care. I hurt people in the process. I want everything to be fair. To be equal. To be understood and mutually accepted.

I want to understand them, so I listen. But also want them to fully understand me. But they won’t hear. How can it be even or right if I hold in my feelings because they do not have ears to hear?

I cannot even share my own hurt. I suppressed it for too long. Now it only hurts others.

The man that I am

Is loving, fully optimistic and genuinely a dork. I am a very caring man.

My heart is big and so is my hurt.

So is my ability to mask and hide my true identity. Like a chameleon I cloak myself to blend in hoping to fit in and be accepted.

I am different.

Most of the time people only get small glimpses of the real me. Seldom well received in my nature so I became a chameleon.

I thought it would bring me closer to those I love the most. But it made me drift further away becoming my own Island of paradise.

The funny thing is that the joke is on me.

After hiding in the tree lines for so long it is hard to think of the boy I once was.

I used to be beautiful. I used to be free. I used to not care what anyone thought of me.

The funniest part… after hiding in the bushes for so long it takes extra courage to be the boy I think I was. What used to come so naturally, effortlessly… now takes liquid to bring back to the surface.

And all I do is hurt.

https://www.reddit.com/r/OCPoetry/s/mHKED2NIsw

https://www.reddit.com/r/OCPoetry/s/eBxGMzMKvF

u/Efficient_Tomorrow57 — 1 day ago