Is Complex PTSD really Curable?
I recently saw on YT a "professional" say it was. I am 52. Was diagnosed at 16 w/PTSD and dissociative D/O NOS and depression due/to extreme abuse of every kind from 3 - 7 and then just emotional/physical until I left home at 17.
In the late 80s, I was told there was no cure. Just learn to cope and move on. And that is what I did. It wasn't easy. Was committed a few times, etc but while locked up, I started reading about dialectic behavioral therapy. I had been told that someone who survived what I did would probably be institutionalized forever. And at 18 I was damned if that was going to be my life. I fought to go to school and it was the best thing I did. Put myself through University, and later grad school. I buried my past as best I could and I created a good life. I was in my late 20s when I figured out how to keep present during flashbacks. Once I figured that, the diasociating grew less and less. In my late 30s, I did 5 weeks of intensive cognitive behavioral therapy d/t flashbacks making me terrified to leave my house at night (which was a problem as I worked 12 hr nights). Most intensive but useful therapy I ever did.
I rescued an older dog 4 years ago but it ended up also helping me because I sometimes hear footsteps and I could look at his reaction and know its just whispers from the past that I can ignore.
I am used to living in fear. My husband let me get a security system and we lock our bedroom door at night and I have bells on my windows. This is my norm. I am used to it. Mostly, I joke about it, but underneath the mask I know the world is scary, so I do what I can to make it feel safer.
I am very easily startled. Embarrassingly so. My husband tries multiple ways to not make me jump, but it isn't his fault. I feel bad because he worries I'll accidentally hurt myself if he startles me while cooking. I doubt it, but sometimes it is a full body response.
I've tried therapy during the last 10 years but have had horrid luck with finding a therapist who treats PTSD with cognitive behavioral therapy. A lot say they do, but they don't and if I have to control the therapy, I'll end up becoming a jokester and therapy becomes an expensive chat session. Gave up looking after I fell down the stairs and had to have 9 surgeries. (Still cannot walk w/o a walker.) Hubby took on a 2nd job and I am studying to change careers to one less physical.
So have things changed? Is this disorder truly curable now? Should I start therapist shopping again? Or was YT wrong and I am actually a poster child of sucessful management of longterm PTSD?