u/Elizabethlilith078

Hi, for context this is about me (F) and my husband (M) he’s almost thirty, my birthday is tomorrow the 7th and I’ll be 24. He has been really rude with his tone lately and raising his voice a lot to me. I am a very emotional person and he is not. I have expressed how the way he speaks to me really affects how I feel for the rest of the day/relationship. He got mad at me because as I was getting our daughter (10mth) ready for bed he asked if I had made him food. I had just gotten home from work and wanted to spend time with my daughter as I hardly get to. I said no I haven’t but I can make something or order something in since it’s my birthday tomorrow. He said for me to do whatever I wanted and just let him know. So I ordered pizza which I’ve been wanting for a while. I ordered the pizza and let him know it was on the way. He said okay. Then about 5 minutes later told me that he has asked me to tell him there is no food for when he comes home or to make him something before he gets home. And stated he gets angry and raises his voice because “I don’t like to repeat myself twice”. I just stoop there listening and I know I can’t control my face so he saw that I was getting upset. I then told him your mom made you food so it’s on the counter if you want to eat that. He proceeded to say “ well at least my mom makes sure I’m fed” I told him why does he have to say things like that. I was trying to say before he interrupted me “ it feels demeaning when you say things like that and make me feel inadequate in this relationship” he cut me off and said “what! I tried to tell you in a calm way and you still don’t understand, (I did) and now you have that stupid face” he left after he said this and I wasn’t even able to “defend” myself. So of course I started crying after he left and now I’m thinking I am in the wrong. I don’t even want to celebrate my birthday, it feels insignificant.
What do you think? Aita?