hello everyone, especially psych majors or people experienced in dealing with psychotic patients, please read & share advice.
My father passed away when I was very small and growing up I have seen my mum as the sole parent. My world revolves around her, she is the only support system I have. I have never, ever seen my mother's siblings or father's siblings support us in hard times. It's mostly been us, me, my mum and my siblings dealing with life. Since the last 2 years, I am contributing majorly to my household expenses. My mother also works and supports the house.
Now lets come to the real situation. My mother has a sister who is a psychotic patient, some doctors say she has schizophrenia, some say its just an intellectual disability. Truth is, nowadays her condition has worsened alot and she cannot take care of herself. She used to live with my eldest khala and now my eldest khala & khalu have refused to keep her as her condition is really bad. She keeps having the episodes, sometimes gets out on the street, irritates them, doesn't sleep at night etc.
Nowadays, the patient is at a centre, where she has been admitted to control her aggressive episodes. Now the thing is, we don't know what is going to happen after her days there are completed.
All my mother's siblings say that my mother should now keep her at our house. Mind you, I already have my grandfather who is extremely old at my house and my borther takes care of him full time. I mean there is already a patient in our home. Then my mom is a single parent, she cannot take another responsibility as the patient requires full-time care, surveilance etc. My mom still has to marry off me and my brother, and take care of so many other things due to her being a single parent.
My eldest khala, on the other hand is retired, stays at home mostly and doesn't really go out. All her children are married. In the past years, whenever my eldest khala had to go out, she used to drop the patient at our house and we rightfully kept her. We have always cooperated with her. Now she has outright refused to keep her and I can't understand how will this situation defuse??? Truth be told she is the only one whose conditions suit to keep the patient with her.
I am extremely close to my mother and internalize a lot of her feelings. She feels an immense amount of guilt nowadays because of her not signing up to take full time care of her sister (the patient). I keep counselling her not to sign up for full time as it wouldn't be possible for us + she wont be able to manage so much.
How do I deal with this situation? I don't say I don't want my mom to ever take care of her sister. My only requirement is that when my mom is at home she can bring her and thats usually on weekends (which btw is also not possible always as my mom has to run errands, AGAIN she is a single parent).
I also feel a huge amount of guilt, I fear Allah that what if I am doing something wrong not giving in. But how do I explain my circumstances? Allah mian, I cannot do this. I cannot let my mom take another responisibility. What do I do???????????
And also, I am going through some health issues myself. I could possibly have a surgery in the next month and my mom goes to the doctors with me. I feel utterly helpless in this situation. All these issues have single handedly fucked my mind. I have no social life, no friends to share all this with. It is sooo lonely and stressful