I keep seeing synchronicities and it’s so so scary and doctors say I am psychotic but how is that possible?? How can the synchronicities be fake?? I can’t make it up. It messes with my head so bad I can’t focus on what’s most important in my life rn. I feel like I’m losing it.
I’ve been diagnosed with schizoaffective disorder for almost 7 years. I’ve moved out and changed doctors many times during that time. I’ve also seen many doctors and residents in the mental health clinic I’m currently being treated at. They never tell me about my diagnosis except when I can get my hands on medical certificates and I can see my diagnosis is still the same. I talked about it during my last appointment, I still don’t understand why I’m being labeled psychotic. I keep making research and looking stuff online and it still feels like a misdiagnosis.
I understand that talking about hearing voices and being sent messages through signs and synchronicities can be interpreted as psychotic but I am the one experiencing those things. I feel like I’m not being taken seriously, I can tell the difference between what’s real and what’s not. I’m not imagining the synchronicities and even though I understand how it can be hard to believe paranormal stuff I don’t think it’s fair to be diagnosed with a severe disorder just because of that. They say I’m in denial or I lack insight but I really don’t understand what makes them so sure I am psychotic. It causes problems because they keep pushing medication I don’t need and neglect my concerns (chronically suicidal and anxious, unable to get out of bed, etc). I’m not sure I’m making sense or if anyone can help me understand….